still alive, and living for You

2008-04-29T13:55:00.002+03:00

HA esther! i made it in time!(:
all the joy has somehow leapt out of blogging, as well as all the entertainment. hmm, i have a strong feeling this is going to be my last post until after the o's. or maybe forever! or maybe not.
but im telling you in advance, since you were nice enough to come here and visit(:
eh anyway nothing much has been happening other than the fact that i am trying to study like MAD to get my 8a1s for prelims and then consequently o's obviously. Though seeing as i am here right now, im not really succeeding, eh?
i am going running in approx 5 mins so that i will get a b or hopefully an a for my 2.4! then i will actually get a GOLD this year!! haha wow. and i thought i would get bronze for sure. oh well next year i will get full points!! (yeah right)
sasha has become obssessed over 'angus, thongs and full-frontal snogging' yet again. She rather fancies she can speak french; goes around saying 'je ne parle pas l'anglais; je parle le francais!' and when i answer her in my pro french with a perfect accent-she replies 'Quoi?' repeatedly until one is forced to relent and speak in english.
haha okay goodbye you sad people who have nothing better to do but come and check on a very long dead blog! i shall NOT be back! :D

2008-03-02T03:54:00.003+02:00

i shall keep to one post a month! sound good to you?(:

school on thursday was pretty sweet haha! after you get over the shock and all; and realise that hey, it's pretty safe, having an escaped terrorist somewhere in the vicinity is actually rather exciting!

fun laughing at the perimeter of special ops people-2 to a tree(: sasha and i recommended raises to those who were standing straight and doing their job properly-not standing around and chatting! tsk.

Bullet proof vests are way cool! i want one! haha but they're very ugly): SC actually padlocked all the gates and didn't let any cars in. until like late afternoon. And mrs wang gave her ss lecture on terrorism haha(: "SCGS? oh the terrorist school!" ouch.

Friday was more or less back to normal, just a few army people lounging under the bushes. SLACKING. oh well they'd prob been out the whole night with their huge black flashlights capable of causing concussion. (long story) though they still didnt let cars in for the morning. monday should be the usual.

you see what a deprived life we lead?? one escaped terrorist=so much fuss!& a page long post. sigh. i need to get a life. oh wait. that's impossible; im taking my o's!):

haha well so long i need to study amath):

2008-02-10T14:55:00.001+02:00

i just wrote a whole lot of crap then deleted it, because it sounded like every other post i've ever written.

i need to do my lit and eng. darn. and study for make-up trigo test. darn darn. and study for bio test. darn darn darn. and do bio project. okay this is not going anywhere. ): i need a diary that will change my life too! :D oh well, but i have a God who already did. (: (: (:

I CANT WAIT I CANT WAIT I CANT WAIT!!!! i'm going to surabaya for a week in june to my aunt's resort so i can slack for a week or so before Major Mugging kicks in. I cant wait!

why is it that while everybody goes to europe, like italy, rome, paris, new york etc to relax; i go to third world countries?? its a CALLING, i tell you! okay i am beginning to feel high with anticipation! (: yay. haha. i miss being high ever so often.

AH i forgot to print french!!
later!(:

2008-02-10T14:39:00.000+02:00

Dear you,
I'm sorry that i haven't been there as much as i used to. Its not that i dont have time for you, but sometimes other things have much more inescapable, unbearable consequences. After the exams, o's, i promise that we'll be us again, the way we used to be. Dont doubt that you still have the same place in my heart that you always had.
I love you,
Dav

HumanForSale.com

2008-01-26T09:03:00.000+02:00

GUESS WHAT!

ahahah! eh not bad leh. thats in USD i think! (although the value is dropping...STILL.)
i just felt like doing it for the novelty of doing so!!

ANYWAY, i think INVEST WAS A SUCCESS!! whooo!
although the feed was really bad): so the school couldnt hear us properly. but i think we performed really well and all our hard work paid off! anyway it was really brilliant for all the people in the KA so yay!
you know, i am SO smart. i didnt wear my specs so i couldnt see the people properly so i wasnt nervous! haha. clever, yes? oh i took some fake IQ test that day and my IQ was 151.. hahah i shall take a real one someday(:
i am so happy that i acutally have time to be on this webpage right now. though i should be studying bio. but still. haha. fine i shall study now cause I MUST DO SUPER WELL FOR MY O'S! 8a1's, here i comeee!
now its up to junyan to reproduce pearlyn's BRILLIANT results! (:

2008-01-12T08:01:00.000+02:00

Dear 57th Prefectorial Board,
Ever since I joined you last September,
I have found what I have been looking for for the past 14 years.
I felt bigger than who I am because I have all of you behind me and I know that no matter what, we are one.
I know I have not always given you my best, but I have resolved for that to change.
And even now that invest is approaching, let us all support each other even more than before, and give our best in return for what we have been given. Let us stand together with Steph and the exco and make this invest the best in all of SC's 109 years.
Together, we are breaking new ground!
to quote Yus, JIAYOU SCPB!

2008-01-12T07:48:00.000+02:00

i feel happy. I have finally slept for longer than 5 hours in a single night(: yay!

actually, 11 hours to be exact.

how is it possible for one to go through 3 years of secondary school without sleeping less than 35 hours a week, and then suddenly in the first week of the 4th year, sleep for a measly 24 hours? sigh. oh and the miracle is that i did not fall asleep in class ONCE. ha! although i must confess i wasnt always paying attention.. (:
from dan's blog: I am convinced my eyebags have reached an all time low and should officially be recorded as some semblance of achievement in my sorry existence.
we have become a mass of walking talking zombies.

carolyn: i have never met anyone who has to make so much effort to look female.
I RESENT THAT. its the shirt i tell you. really. plus notice the heels, the necklace, the LONG HAIR, the earring. its obvious in fact. :D

you know what. i have no bronze, no silver and definitely no gold; BUT i am only seven things away from GOLD! (: yippee! although 5 are outdoor things. I WILL FIND A WAY. I SO WILL.
so many things i wanted to say, but now i cant remember them anymore.
well lunch now. tata!

2008-01-10T16:02:00.000+02:00

i said it to no one in particular; they all heard but none understood. I thought i made it perfectly clear? TOO obvious? I guess not.
It's liberating to say it aloud.

2008-01-09T15:24:00.000+02:00

school so far has been.. um well.. how shall i say it?
DOWNRIGHT AWFUL?
yeah that pretty much covers it! okay fine its not so much anything but the fatigue, the strain! im so drained. i could use a holiday. or well, a 'holy day' as mrs lim said. (: of course its been great catching up with all, pace is picking up, we're gaining momentum.

On wednesday junyan came to me and proclaimed, thrilled: "mrs chem is my Yogee teacher!" she only realised her mistake like 10 seconds later! (: hahah. she's too happy lah.

we got a new french teacher! monsieur Robert! he's cool(: haha he says 'french is lazy' cos they simplify everything and its hardly as long winded as english. for example, a 'sudden flash of lighting' is replaced by 'flash (in the sky)' because "have you ever seen lightning that didnt come in a flash and wasnt sudden?" oh man the French are so SMART.

sitting next to lydia alexis ong again!(: hahah for sure it will be an entertaining year! yay partner<3 she's sick now though! but better than yesterday. i think she's coming tmr.

i dont know what im doing here i need to do work! but oh well. i will be back to my ultra irregular posting soon!

have a good week!<3

2007-12-31T15:36:00.000+02:00

you know, i didn't really want to come online now. but i forced myself to, for the sake of a dec31st post! haha.

its prob great that school's reopening, that i'm soon going to be caught up in work, in responsibilites i cannot, will not, must not shirk, in other things. because lets face it, i'm thinking about it too often.Oh well, we all knew holidays had to end sometime, right?

but, since its the end of the year, lets end on a happy note(: i suppose i shall end with a thank you to everyone out there who made this year so memorable, who helped to carry me through everything.

sasha martin, thank you for always being there for me to talk to, for offering the best advice; and for being a wonderful blessing in my life. i treasure you, friend.
esther yong, i love you twin tower!! thanks for the crazy outings where we never know where to go, for the letters, and for being the greatest heir (air) anyone could hope for! BALLET!! haha.
ng jun yan, mon cherie! our shopping trips, french classes. ah, french classes! MOELC ne serait rien sans vous et votre petit ami! (: AHAHAH. oh, vous savez que c'est vrai! je t'aime, et j'espère qu'il y aura beaucoup plus d'années d'amitié(:
nat yeo, my dear friend! i miss you so much. there's no excuse for not meeting up more often. i'm sorry i keep cancelling and rescheduling. i promise we'll go to island more often next year even though its going to be much crazier! i love you!
the sc cell, thank you for always supporting me and helping me to grow spiritually. I hope that this coming year we will really make a difference; together we are strong in Him!
the church cell, aka Afterword! i dont think any of you actually read this, but thank you anyway for being like a wonderful family despite what we were in the beginning and i hope we'll become even closer in the coming year!
cam, suffy, thank you guys for being so supportive and for listening when i needed you to. you guys rock<3!
sarah soh, hannah, eunice, dinner buddies haha! its been a year of insane dinners and highs, of trying to mug in the before our cells, of chick lit and other irrelevant nonsense. thanks so much for all of that and for being so darn fabulous!<3!
lydia, kat, val, debra g, leanne, sam, amelia, meredith thanks for making 3GY insanely fun despite all the WORK and all, for post-exam bridge and pre-exam destressing(:

and thanks to everyone else in india (who will never read this) for making my 18days with you so fantastic(: you are irreplaceable<3

and of course thank you dear God, for making all of this possible, for giving me all these wonderful people. In the coming year, help me to treausure each and every one of them even more and to be more like You. thank you for all that You've done and all that You're going to do.

HAPPY NEW YEAR guys, God bless and take care! all the best for the coming year. (in no less than 1 hour and 44 minutes as of now!)

if you draw near to Him, it will be His pleasure to hold you and shelter you.

2007-12-28T06:02:00.000+02:00

belated MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

its now like 11.30 and i cannot sleep. another appointement today; one more tomorrow. it looks good, but what if its not?

honestly, im scared.

but ANYWAY. Christmas was fun-ner than usual. the usual people came plus like a few more that my dad invited. so there were about 30-40 people crammed into my humble 4-room flat. (: hahah but it wasnt so bad there were lots of kids (my nephews and one niece) but they were wrecking my house and i was closing my eyes and going 'never mind, its okay. its okay' to myself.

it was strange. for the first time in nearly 6 years, i found myself missing Jose. i wish i could just go back to then, back to it all. the Taj mahal visits, the guitars, the christmas plays (i was Mary!! :D), the wednesday night cell groups, the caroling in the cold, the motorbike rides-despite my mother's fervent protests! i mean who could blame her? traffic there is like..well as though everyone's driving blindfolded with their hands permanently stuck to the horn.

but then at the same time, im glad to be here. the 23-31 deg winter, the christmas tree of red&gold, the church musicals (i can no longer act ): ), the shopping!, the soon-to-be-continued friday cell groups, the riding at Pasir Ris park (and slowing down at the end to let my nephews win the 'race')

but even then, wherever you are, Christmas doesn't change. And wherever you are, if God's with you, it'll always feel like home. <3

2007-12-23T09:20:00.000+02:00

yay i feel proud of myself! i managed to do quite alot of work today.(:

yesterday was Christmas at church! hahaha(: we had "cell" which consisted of playing foosball (cam&me vs. yisin&rachel) haha cam is an excellent goalie! and im not too bad at it either! we won haha 10-4? (: reminded me of Austen+Juniper Hall<3! and we also played like 2 rounds of bridge! my partner turned out to be yi sin both times and we won both(: haha yay. 3GY BRIDGE CLUB<3

and then we decided to go and join the ever growing queue to get in. it reached the hawker! haha it was crazy. but we got okay seats even though we were relatively far back. the musical was pretty understandable except the first part didnt really link to the rest somehow? oh and the part with the disco ball was really pretty(:

dinner at hawker in the end! but it was nice<3 sarah moved to BEDOK! haha so we can go out mroe often! (: ahaha. yes, the east is way cooler than town! pasir ris is the COOLEST! XD

ah yes, and then the letter! thank you my dear!

yesterday was one of those days! haha gosh i sound so lovesick and romantic! hahah. no, i guess im just happy? its all gettting better and better. this is how it should be! yup; i could live with this(:

thank you almighty God! Christmas is Yours; and let me never forget it.

when i remember; the whole world falls back into place. <3

2007-12-21T04:19:00.000+02:00

this is so bad. i owe it to them; i made this commitment. but yet im finding it so difficult to keep my promises. Once again; i bit off more than i could chew. please please forgive me guys. i am so sorry.

garh. well; i am going to school soon. its rather dangerous seeing as i haven't taken public transport to school for really long-so i dont know how long it takes. I'll just go with 1hr15min for good measure. hopefully the bus comes quickly, else im dead.

Christmas is coming! but all i can think of is all the homework left undone. and the phone call. i should have pushed myself earlier. never mind! i will complete it! somehow.

jy and i were laughing at the effect india has on people! how you'll just automatically shake your head from side to side and respond "han" [pronounced: ha] in agreement when someone asks you a question. and all the delightful bargaining. though mine is prob easier than hers.
(in hindi) me: how much? shopkeeper: xx rupees me: too much! xx-50 rupees shopkeeper: its not possible! me: fine (and walks away) shopkeeper: okay okay xx-25 rupees me: uhh.. oh fine its only like 2 bucks less anyway! okay!

i miss India. sigh. yes; still. jun yan and i have decided to go backpacking after a's! and we shall go to India among other cool places(: haha i hope it really happens-So exciting!!

i may go to Kyrgystan next year. i'll have to celebrate my birthday there! which is cool. but i dont really want to go somehow? if i go we'll be teaching english and im supposed to go and find all the "young people" and socialise! haha. except im not very good at that sort of thing. i dont know, still praying about it.

well i shall go now need to leave soon.

2007-12-18T06:44:00.001+02:00

You don't have to be a hero;
I know it's hard for you, I understand
Just do your best, i'll be behind you all the way.
i'm here if you ever need me.

That's what you should have said.

2007-12-14T05:36:00.001+02:00

i cannot stand blogger. i have half a mind to switch to wrodpress or xanga or something but the other half (of my mind) cant be bothered.

so too bad.

it turns out SASHA MARTIN is a lot more influential than i'd like to believe. NO, i still maintain that the jonas brothers have no outstanding talent and are not worth my admiration. however, i have taken to watching their clips on youtube because its so retarded and funny. haha. sigh.

eee i keep having these horrible weird dreams and it is freaking me out!! if they were actually ture.... they're not actually nightmarish. but if they actually happened... i hope i never know.

THIS PERSON who is living in my house, is driving me insane! grrr. go away go away go away!! the only upside is that she's so taxing to my parents that im a more responsible kid and i do alot more stuff around the house (e.g ironing for my mom!).

well off to meet TWIN (: and have fun. hahaha! india pictures next week or something(:

2007-12-13T10:00:00.000+02:00

i'm baaaaackkk! (:

well for some time now. it wasn't long after i got back that all of it-everything-starting crashing back down onto me. all the things i'd temporarily forgotten in my blissful world of uh.. air pollution? and church visiting and shopping and people visiting and catch-upping(: (: it all screamed: GET BACK TO WORK!! sigh and i had to obey. but its not really as bad as i make out:

!ncredible !ndia says:
cafe latttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeee!
Hrithik Roshan<3!>
HEY!
!ncredible !ndia says:
sharukh khan is so much hotttttttterrrrrrrrrrr
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

EH NO WAY
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

HRITHIK ROSHAN
!ncredible !ndia says:
omg no,
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

YES.
!ncredible !ndia says:
sharukh khan
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

sharuh khan is like hw oldd

!ncredible !ndia says: he's older now but he was even hotter when he was younger
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

yeah well

Hrithik Roshan<3!>

thing is
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

hes OLD NOW
!ncredible !ndia says:
i dont CARE!!
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

HRITHIK ROSHAN HAS EYES THAT KILL
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

I SWEAR I ALMOST DIED WHEN I WATCHED DHOOM AGAIN
!ncredible !ndia says:
omg i feel bimbotic
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

as what my friend says
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

hes the god of hotness
!ncredible !ndia says:
hurh see how hrithik looks in ?? years huh
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

hrithik was hot is hot and will be hot
!ncredible !ndia says:
no wayyyy
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

haha WE SHALL SEE
Hrithik Roshan<3!>

meet up for tea one day when we're 30 or something
!ncredible !ndia says:
haha fineee

heh heh. insane msn convos: haha a little piece of heaven on earth(:

and sharukh khan is hot i dont care [except when he's acting gay-ish e.g. some tv ads (!!)]

although he is kinda old now but still. and i do admit that hrithik roshan is hot. just that i think sharukh is HOTTERR(: haha and they're like both married?! XD

haha anyway. obviously my trip was good haha. i always dont feel like going and then i never feel like coming back. honestly; i make life difficult for myself. umm i have some pictures. my parents were rather trigger-happy with the cam, but mostly my dad who still uses the film-camera so i cant get them here nicely. haha but later im lazy now(:

going out for dinner now. oh and my back curve thingy has FINALLY been discharged(: (: so im free! yay. haha. and retainer-free during the day too :D

2007-11-16T08:35:00.001+02:00

heh. i'm lazy to blog about all that's been happening!

but this should cover most of it.

i have had the most enjoyable week possible and i think the wonderful-est birthday ever (as one tends to say nearly every year, because they just keep getting BETTER!)

monday i spent quality time with sasha eugenia and charis! we had alot of fun doing mostly nothing! we played taboo which i really suck at guessing cause i've got no idea who's who and all that. hahah honestly would you connect PLANT to GEORGE BUSH?? well maybe. but still.

we picnicked in pasir ris park and eug insisted that we fly sasha's kite depite the obvious fact that there was NO WIND. hahah. we ended up looking stupid. (:and her mom baked fabulous muffins! hahah and we all expressed our dismay at her fancy for the JONAS BROTHERS. finally another-at least-one person who agrees with me just as strongly! (: it was nice to be together again!

wednesday after invest prac we-the sc cell FINALLY went out! ahaha. we just walked around alot and ate and danitza and abby went chasing after utt-but thats another story(: but it was so overdue and i think that we all enjoyed ourselves! eating free bread from cafe cartel(: oh and they surprised me with a birthday slice of cake with a candle and they sang so that everyone else fell silent! (: HAHA. i kind of suspected it when dan said "i need to go to the toilet" very insistently(if there's such a word)but i didnt take myself seriously! ha. but yay thanks so much guys, you rock<3

yay then today went out with TWIN TOWER HYDROGEN(: i was originally supposed to leave for malaysia today, but thank goodness im leaving tmr morning so i got to go out with her today! (: haha i dont know what made me do it but i decided to wear a skirt. i think there are only 5 people alive who have seen me wearing a skirt-before yesterday that is. they are my mom, dad,uncle,aunt,cousin! haha.oh well it wasnt too bad. we went to swensen's and had the firehouse happy birthday! YAY! (: and roamed around bugis street and junction. saw lailing and xiaomin(: and i bought SHOES!! yes, i actually found a pair that fit. i felt like hugging the lady at the shop(but i didnt)! i think its not so much where we go, but who we're going with. and so even though we didnt DO much, it was great being together. Although she claims its the most productive trip she's been on for a long time cause she actually bought something! haha i'm a good influence(:

well, so now, other than all the people i crossed paths with yesterday, there are 10 people alive (that i know) who have seen me in a skirt. the five aforementioned, lai, xiaomin, esther (duh), trixia and benny. ): the last two would have been avoided if i could help it. but sadly my parents wanted to pick me up from esther's house later, so i had to wait there and unavoidably, trixia was at home. She can drive now btw! esther wanted to get her to pick us up from the mrt, but seeing as she had company, she refused to reply her sms! ): oh well.

moral of the story: i should wear skirts more often so that it will not be so obvious when i do!

haha yay thank God for such a wonderful birthday with such wonderful friends!<3 i'm off to malaysia tmr then to india (YAYYY YAY YAY YAY...) so see you all when i get back(:

2007-11-04T05:25:00.000+02:00

i haven't blogged for a LOONG time! haha oh well!

man im starting to get really sentimental! its started ever since i realised that this year was coming to an end... you realise how fast its gone by! okay, so you've heard all of that.

then miss hu comes along and makes 3gy all emo with her warm fuzzies and self-addressed postcards. i didnt think i'd know what to write to myself-honestly. but once i started writing i seemed to have alot to say! i'm really happy that im not changing classmates again next year though! i really love mine! <3

and then today i turn on my computer and see a tag from SHARMAINE THIA! ohmygosh do you know that was like 5 years ago but it feels like a lifetime! and i started remembering shps and everyone there and all the good times! When i was in primary 4/8! and i think i was very weird then! oh well hahah thats not the point. OH i was also smart then. well, smarter. 5th in standard, baby! now i'm like 100 something i bet. sigh. i remember miss wong (well now mrs something), how she used to make us pray everyday before starting class. I miss that!! and her really encouraging journal remarks. haha i went through my journal that day; i realise i was a horrible suck-up!! eee. haha i certainly have changed alot!

you know, i had really fabulous friends in primary school.. but i've lost touch with most of them. like deanna gan, reyna(my TWIN-16th nov!)...aiyah the list goes on! but i cant possibly type all. that day i saw this guy who i'm positive was in my school bus! but he was younger than and i think he's probably graduated now too. the school bus was cool! haha sometimes i still see mr.neo in the mornings when im waiting for the car and he waves! (: ahaha. when Zandra leaves shps, he won't come this way anymore):

and of course 5/6, and 6/6 FAITH!! i remember being really sad when i went to 5/6 cos no one i knew was there! except for darshini! haha she was the one who intro-ed me to eug and charis and sasha! but im glad now though. if i hadn't been in 5/6 and 6/6 i wouldn't have met mrs nancy ng who was really fabulous, and sasha and i wouldn't know each other so well. i wouldn't be meeting charis, eug and terry somewhat regularly either.

we should try and have a 6/6 gathering next year after o's! i hope people will come! it'll be nice to see each other again, after 4 years and alot of changes. ahh i love reminiscing although it tends to make me sad):

i dont have any pics of primary school or i'd put some up... sigh. you know, i never used to be one of the tallest in primary school. and now; well im the second tallest in school. though yes, it is a girl's school. but even so. people change. i just dont want to change till i'm altogether different.

i must be getting old.

2007-10-13T08:35:00.001+02:00

I love you Jesus. So much.
if i've done everything wrong; this is the only thing i've done right.

2007-10-04T15:20:00.000+02:00

today is my best friend's birthday! As such, i have dedicated this post to HER! (:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAFIA AMELIA LIVINGSTON!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH EVEN IF WE LIVE SEAS APART<33333!

i remember all the times i used to sleepover at your house and help your mom bake her fantastic cakes and eat all the leftovers after she sent them all off to her clients! (: especially her lemon meringue thingy! heavenly!

and when she got an order for a wedding cake! she wouldn't let us touch it of course but we'd admire it and eat icing from the tube! (: HAHA!

and playing i-dont-know-what in your little room, then your big room and now its your little room again! (: and going to Lodhi park once on your birthday and playing on that silly little colourful "children's bridge" and we had so much fun!

and all the times you took me with you to your mom's performances and yours too! and that time when your mom was singing at this Hungarian place and we met this lady called 'crystal' and gave her that ring that she wore for her performance! and then after that we made up some silly story about the floods coming and how we had to put up the "kalooz"! :D haha it's so funny now remembering it! We laughed insanely while putting up all the "kalooz" though! (:

and i remember when your mom opened fabcafe and we used to go there and drink that lemon shikanjvee?? cant spell it! and eat the yummy humus bread thing! fantastic! and lal jim who used to call me 'divyani'/'briyani' cos he cuoldn't pronounce it and you used to laugh so hard!

and how we used to talk so much even then and how you were crazy about d*n** and you still are! and when you hurt your foot in the bicycle wheel and it didnt stop you from coming over and being your usual happy self even when the cotton wool under the cast came off you were still optimistic although it must have hurt alot.

i miss making you laugh because at least then i knew that you laughed with me and not somebody else that i wanted to be. i miss our time together and we cried so much when i knew i was moving to Singapore.

It's all really different now. Your mom doesn't sell her cakes anymore, we dont see each other often enough to play silly things, Lodhi park's changed;doubtless, you're the one performing now, the cafe's closed, d*n** has cancer and moved away for awhile and i dont make you laugh half as much as i wish i could.

but you know what? we'll always be best friends because true friends are there for each other no matter what and you've always been there for me. and even though seeing you once a year is far from enough, there's still the hope thaty someday, somehow, we'll end up living in the same country again. Until then; thank God for technology!

I LOVE YOU! <3

2007-10-02T06:26:00.000+02:00

EXAMS ARE almost OVER!!!!
and i had no school today! (: cos its only the mother tongue papers!! haha gosh i love taking FRENCH! (:
speaking of which- thanks to my dear young grandmother who takes JAP, i now know a cool french band!-kyo! (: haha. and their songs are pretty nice. well some of them anyway. but they're super emo! i like the song "derniere danse" and it doesnt have too weird a meaning like some of their songs!
listen!: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uuj3D9wPIpM
the translators aren't too good at translating songs so i had to use my amazing skill! and my trusty dictionary! (: goodness sasha says im sounding more and more ego and more like junyan everyday! HAHA. sigh. it may be true!
sasha also says i should marry a chinese cos then my kids will be chindian and chindians are always gorgeous! (: haha. but if she marries an indian or malay her children will have an even more complicated pie chart than she does! 1/16 french? haha who knows!
do you realise that with all finals being over and everything-we're fast approaching the end of another year?? I dont know where all the time goes!! life is flying by! before i know it, i'll be taking my o's and then a's and going to university and all! and then what? not sure what God has planned! but you know, it seems like just the other day we were sec twos mugging for our finals and then celebrating. and then getting shifted to streams and me thinking how awkward it was cos i didnt know many people in 3GENEROSITY(: but now its been 9 months together! WOW. WHERE DOES ALL THE TIME GO?????
but yet so many things have happened in this year! like... okay i shall save all that for end-december posts where everybody is remembering 2007 and setting goals for 2008 that are so rarely acheived! (:
eeya i shall go now and enjoy more slacking!! (: who studies for english anyway? :D

je veux juste une derniere danse; avant l'ombre et l'indifference

2007-09-05T14:05:00.000+03:00

i haven't posted for so long!!

anyway i am back from GIB! (: (: (: i am so glad i went! like in the beginning i was kinda of dreading it cos i thought it was going to be weird. being a new prefect and everything. but it wasn't! the whole thing was really tiring, i slept a grand total of 7 hours over the 3 nights! (: but it was a very good experience and i really learnt alot about leadership. and i felt really bonded to everyone else there. it really wasnt weird anymore. (: (: (:

i'm so happy! (: and as dan pointed out: its so scary that we all look so normal in boleros! (: hahahah! i was in a really COOL family group called DUH. (: led by mel leong and sarah chen! and consisted of the 2 of them, me, chuan en; Sec 2s: steph leong, nandini, nadia; Sec 1s: farisha and esther seetoh (who is SO unlike rachel).

and then we had to learn and present a french song on tuesday and you wouldn't believe how hard it is to repeat the french 'r' over and over again in a bid to get everyone to say it! which they didnt- its easier and still sounds alright if you slightly swallow your 'r'. and i think everyone did really really well because its very hard and they all still managed to sound rather french! (: the song was called 'Qui a le droit' which means 'who has the right'. its a very nice song! oh and all the french words started mel leong and denyse to start exclaiming french swear words and asking me t teach them! haha. i did eventually-just ONE! but mel keeps forgetting it anyway, so its alright.(: but it was so FUN! haha.

and then yesterday night we were all so sad and su (our trainer) did this circle thing with the sec3s and we were all supposed to say anything we wanted. and everyone just started saying such meaningful sweet emo sad things and everyone was so sad cos this is our last GIB and i was kind of still treasuring my first GIB experience-but i am really sad that it wont ever happen again! ): and i think that the sec3s really bonded alot alot over the 4 days! and anyway almost everyone was crying): and then the sec ones and twos came in and performed for us something they prepared in like 15 min and it was so sweet! i love you juniors! <3 and then we all went and did it again in our family groups! emo emo emo!

and i finally understand why all the prefects used to go "i love SCPB" because now i do too!! (: yes. and i can't wait to see what we accomplish next year. i think that if we can come so far in 4 days under su's guidance; we can definitely do great things as a board! my heart is satisfied! XD just got to get through end years first! ): but i know i can do it! i know we all can!

i believe i can
i believe i will
i believe i know my dreams are real!

2007-08-14T14:58:00.000+03:00

ahhrgh. trying to write an essay for my history project!! ):

i have this so far:

Our current minister mentor Lee Kuan Yew served Singapore for many years with his determination, perseverance, courage in the face of adversity, his firm beliefs in justice, and his industriousness. These are only a few of the many qualities he possessed, but an important few nonetheless. Lee Kuan Yew expected great things for Singapore; and attempted great things for Singapore.

His determination and perseverance was a strong driving force behind the changes that largely influenced what Singapore is today.

and then im stuckk! i really suck at phrasing things. ): boo. ah. i shall post pics of a very memorable last week later! (: im lazy now. and i need to go study french once i finish comparing the characteristics of stalin, hitler, and MM Lee Kuan Yew.

tired, tired.

ahh okay i shall go off and concentrate now! so long! (:

2007-08-05T07:13:00.000+03:00

its national day soon! (: yay! which means day of His power with the sc cell; ending our fast; ndp with jun yan; belated birthday dinner for my mom with my really cool uncle; and sleeping over at aunty indu's house! i m so excited for this week! (:

and then come the tests after! ): but i will enjoy this week first! (: yay.

FOP friday night with danitza, tammie and abbyheng! (: it was totally unplanned cos my parents said i couldn't go at first. but after alot of begging and pleading and praying, they let me go till 9 plus.. okay so i missed the message; but i'd rather have gone for just the worship than not gone at all. i really connected with God and realised His love and greatness anew! (: Praise the Lord:D

sat was oral. ): boo. it was alright though. but i still dont wanna think about it anymore! then junyan and i went to alliance francaise to check out DELF. (french exam) we want to take b1, but if we fAIL; its a waste of money and effort! gonna have to do online diagnostic test. hopefully, we can do B1. that way, i'll ace my o's! (:

combined cell yesterday: the room was so full. abby's testimony was really encouraging and it reminded me of why i really go on mission trips in the first place. i practically grew up on a mission trip; spend my holidays on missions trips-it seems so normal that im liable to forget the real meaning of the mission trip. i go on it for God; not because i do it all the time and although every trip i discover something new; sometimes it seems like its about me and not about God. so i m going to remember this as i pray about mission trip vs holiday to india at the end of this year.

well, off now. (:

quote of the week: worship is our response to what we value most.

2007-07-22T06:38:00.000+03:00

hello! (:

its the 22nd! august is almost here! (: well, its closer than before.

racial harmony on fri! i wore a punjabi suit and everyone said i looked super skinny! especially beside all of them who looked really puffy in saris!! (: haha. i think i tied so many saris i got blisters! XD

after guides meet junyan and sasha martin for dinner before choir concert. junyan wanted to go orchard so we went to wheelock-fish&co, and after that we felt so CHEATED. firstly, it was our first time there (except when i went with my parents ages ago) and everything was so EX! then, the service was really bad. they ran out of ice, they served people who came AFTER us, BEFORE us, and they didn't serve the dishes together. i waited like half an hour.. AND the service charge+GST was like 9bucks. NEVER AGAIN.

and we thought we'd be late, so we practically ran from wheelock to far east to take bus back to school which came soon enough. and on the bus sasha and i were praying like crazy! then we ran across the overhead bridge to into school; and made it just on time. (: God is so GREAT!

concert was really good! cheryl giam has amazing vocals! and KOH YUNQI looked so pretty; like a DOLL. contrast to her NCC uniform. (: all the choir people sang really well and looked really nice(: yes, you guys are awesome.

service yesterday was well, powerful. i'm so glad for God. (: every week i go to church for Him and every week i am never disappointed. And i know that even though i dont understand, He does; and that makes it alright.

i love teasing sarah ng. she said; and i quote: "huh? why are you waiting for sarahng? where's sarah ng?" 5 seconds later: "eh? oh man i just revealed my stupid side. excuse me while i go kill myself." and she walks away(: that girl is a classic.

okay, till next time then! (:

quote for the week: nothing is impossible for God. (half of ps jennifer's sermon!) XD

2007-07-12T16:02:00.000+03:00

BLOCK TESTS ARE OVERRR!! okay, okay, a bit lag, but i dont exactly have a lot of time to go online often okay!

anyway, i've just got history, so i needn't work THAT hard. right? ahh, i will not think of work!

okay. eh, did you know that when you wear a black shirt and you sweat, when it dries, the sweat outline turns white from SALT?!?! if you did, wow. If you didn't, well neither did i until that day, when i saw my dad: the living, walking, proof!

cool, huh?

well, studied at white sands with sasha martin yesterday. oh and Will came along just to eat ice-cream(: Will's such an idiot. ahh i miss uk trip!! i was reminiscing that day about the stupid name game we played on loong bus rides and how mei-e would say crazy things, e.g 'trook', 'frook', 'emporio' etc. :D and today during guides leader's training; it felt like lit trip all over again when mdm marini told abby and i about the journalling.

i skipped french today! :D yay. oh there's this MOE excel fest thingy going on in our school and our school has been magically transformed to look really different within one day! nat says it looks like a circus with all the tents! (: ahaha. actually, i agree! it looks weird. and all the tv's everywhere.. weird. cna only, plus there's never any sound!

performing our poem tmr at 'lunchtime by the pond'. im the oh-so-cool guy! :D haha. phua is the shortie who gets rejected by michelle, who marries me! and phua sinks into depression for the rest of her life. :D (jane austen, what can i say?)

well, i shall go then and find myself a tie to wear. :D i guess i'll see you when i see you!

i'm so so happy for you, so proud of you; remember i'll always be here for you. i know you can do it!

2007-07-06T15:22:00.001+03:00

you know, i just realised, i never put any pictures here! hahah dont know why. well, i guess its cos i dont really take alot of pictures.. but even then! well i shall post some soon then! maybe some cool uk photos that i haven't shown anyone! :D

soo, two lousy tests are overr! i've got two more): and then there's history. but history isn't a mid-year in bad disguise! :D sigh. well, at least this week wasn't that bad cos there were only four days..

oh in school cell, we're going on (well, gone on) a Daniel fast! for the 40 days. No meat (except fish-protein!) and delicacies until 10 august! :D its not that hard except for a few things-i dont really like fish, and i survive mainly on meat. TEMPTATION you wouldn't believe. In fact, i think it may actually be easier for me to eat one meal a day than not eat meat constantly. However, that isn't an option, beacuse if i tried, i'd be dead. twice. First my doctor, then my mum would kill me. stupid gastric!!! ):

yes3 tomorroww!! :D yay! too bad junyan couldn't come. next time yeah? (: michelle's coming!! double yay! maybe she'll start attending our church? that'll be real cool!

i wanna go skating!! i haven't been in SO long and i still suck! ): sam you must teach me! i wanna be a pro ice-skater like youu! (: haha. thanks sam for always being patient with me and helping me to get started and constantly encouraging me! dont know what i'd do without you! <3

oh and joke of the week: this guy in my french class asked jun yan for her number! and i'm so psychic i KNEW it! well, i hinted it to her cos seriously, its really obvious. She called me and reported the whole conversation! (: it doesnt sound as funny as it really was. you gotta know junyan for you to understand this!

oh and we're going to ndp wearing red&white. tres patriotic, non?

hmmmm i've been feeling rather emo lately! like all of a sudden i'll just feel really bad. and that day when i told N, and N said i didnt seem like i could ever be emo. i just got really irritated! i dont know if that was good or bad, but i'm human too you know! maybe you think im too nice, but im not, and i know at least one person who'd be willing to tell you that.

well, so please do pray for me.. i guess its school and everything, i'm just more irritable nowadays. its not so evident in school, but when i come home i just wanna snap at everybody. and it takes every ounce of effort to be polite to my parents. Sometimes i let my temper get the better of me; and probably many of those times i'm acting like a spoilt 5 year old. i haven't done anything stupid enough to regret for the rest of my life, but i just may. i guess my dad knows that; and he doesn't want me to make the same mistakes he has..

well, i ought to go study chem now.. or maybe i'll just sleep and get up extra early tomorrow to STUDY. sighh.

itsreallyhardformetoopenup;pleaseunderstandthat.ineveraskedtobethisway,ijustam.

2007-07-02T09:44:00.000+03:00

come to think about it, last week actually wasn't as bad as i expected. i think this week will be a whole lot worse!! ): i've got 2 stupid mid years coming up tmr and wed and i haven't finished studying but i cant concentrate properly and i dont know what else to study and how to revise!!! SO, im taking break. (yeah right. i havent done any proper work) i just CANT. aughhhhh its frustrating.

i hope i dont fail the block tests.

a few days ago i was complaining to a friend about how much stuff there is to study and everything-like for bio and chem and even amath. and she lives overseas so she was really fascinated by all the stuff we're learning. And she told me: when you're learning stuff like myocardial infarctions, thrombosis, atherosclerosis, modulus functions, sine, cosine and tangent, you gotta feel smart. sadly, i dont think it sounds very smart. :(

sasha's trying to make me feel better by telling me that i study more than her! hahah thanks martini, i feel very encouraged. but sadly, it doesn;t change the fact that i've got tonnes more to study and the test is tomorrow!! ):

AUGHHH.

i shall think about happier things. like like when jun yan and i were going to french, and we were being lazy and waiting for the 410. and you know how like one has a GREEN plate and one has a WHITE plate on the SIDE of the bus? well yeah then when jun yan saw the bus coming, she looked at the bus number on the FRONT, and she said "huh? how come its RED?" (: and i kept laughing at her! (: silly girl.

oh and campfire was actually quite fun despite the rain! The fire was really ultra ugly, and it was really sad to see the beautiful fire die in the rain! ): but i guess these things do happen. and tammie and i were doing guestbook duty. it was really stupid cos all these people would wander in and we had to ask them if they were ex-guides and if they weren't they would give us this LOOK. haha. oh and stupid acsi said they're not coming then said they're coming and we had to sit there waiting for them for awhile until we just LEFT. they didn't show up. seriously, they do this every year! ugh.

hahaha yeah and then the best part of my week-church! :D yay! it was so high and fun. it was carmen's official farewell. ): awww. will miss her alot! we went to macs. and had cake! melted cake. :D and carmen gave a really sweet speech! love you dear<33

and then we had service. which was high. (: im glad i can multi-task, i managed to absorb pastor Glenn's sermon and tease sarah at the same time. :D hahah i love sarah she's so fun to tease! :D and she's so nice cos she doesnt mind it! (: hahaha yay!

anyway, i shall go and do something more productive.. like attempt to study. please please pray i dont fail all my block tests which are seriously mid-years in disguise! do they really think they've fooled us???

fickle emotions,cantyoumakeupyourmind?thisisnotjustaboutyou.

2007-06-19T08:08:00.000+03:00

hello hello! oh my the hols are almost over and this time next week we'll be back in school slogging away.... sigh.

but until then i still have time to catch up with my work and enjoy myself. :D and i have been really.

on friday i went out with TWIN TOWER to celebrate her birthday! (: kinda sucks having your birthday in November:( but at least cool friends who stayover help make up for it<3 anyway, we decided to go Marina Square. i was reciting in my head "wish her! wish her!" but i couldnt find her, and then when i did i forgot.. oops. heh. but anyway i wasn't too lag! i wished her within 5.. okay 10 minutes. (: so so when we got to marina we decided to watch a movie! actually we wanted to watch shrek cos seriously, there is nothing good on! BUT it wasnt showing anymore!

SO, we walked over to Suntec and guess what! there was Shrek-12.30.. the time: 12.55 ME: hurh. let's watch something else lah. HER: like what? fantastic four? (kidding) ME: well, we could you know. hahah so we stood there for like 10 min trying to decide. and i taught her the pick-one-finger decision making method! and she chose FANTASTIC FOUR. so we decided to go eat first. and guess what? it was decisions all over again. seriously, that place has SO MANY eateries.

so we proceeded to the run-your-finger-along-the-list-of-restaurants-and-i'll-say-stop method. which TOTALLY doesn't work. so we ended up at Burger King. :D and she traumatised me from ever eating mcdonald's fries again. well ever for now anyway. :D

well we made it just as the movie was starting and i stepped on some guys toe. whoops! (: i have big feet okay! it was pretty okay really. i think the silver surfer's board is really cool! okay then we ended up in toys r us. again. and i rmbed the PARASOL incident. shhh! (:

actually, after that we just basically walked around and around and around, talking, laughing, getting tired, burning calories. oh and not forgetting building our friendship, of course (: we had the really yummy chocolate thing at delifrance:D after walking alot more, i had to go): so sad. but we did manage to sharon-shop, if not dad-shop. (:

love you estherr! <3> H2O~twin tower thing

sat: church again! Gosh i didnt realise how much i missed my wonderful church family<3 it was so great to be back in church. God's been with me in uk too though, so what i really missed was the people! i dont want to leave church! ever! i ALMOST did a longg time ago. thank God i stayed! i know He had a purpose:D

sun: Father's Day! my dad wasn't feeling to great so he was asleep most of the day. but my mom wanted to shop! so she dragged me with her. to the John Little closing down sale? umm. she didnt actually buy alot! but she bought me a pretty blouse(: she said its "causeyou'reworkingsohardmumblemumble" okay i'm not complaining! but im not really. i should be studying now! ):

im so thankful for EVERYBODY in my life! esp Cordelia Chan! i love you alot darling! i haven't talked to you for forever, but i really love you alot and your Superman thing! <3

yes, i was saying im really thankful that God has given me such wonderful people to make me so happy even when everything isn't going so great. i love each and every one of you LOADS<33333!

2007-06-14T15:07:00.000+03:00

WOW.

18days just FLEW past. seriously. at first they seemed to be going really slowly! and then all of a sudden, ZOOM. and we were on our flight home!

but it was really really great. im really glad i went on the trip. i got to know so many people for the first time and many others even better than before. and of course, i learnt LIT! hahah. sadly, im not going around spouting shakespeare (or wordsworth or austen) BUT i have found a new interest in Jane austen's books and i can actually understand Shakespeare properly! WHEE. its quite cool really.

I LOVE plays. i shall go watch more sometime(: i actually quite liked the Seagull. okay i admit the first part was a little boring and cos i was tired, i ALMOST fell asleep. (i didnt sleep at ALL in any plays okay!) BUT. the second part after the interval was better and i liked the way they did the ending. like putting less emhpasis on the actual occurence compared to the lie that we WANTED to hear. so yeah. nina is such an IDIOT and i cant stand her!

okay yes anywayy... we saw JOHNNY DEPP'S house! well at least one of them? hahah. it was cool! and expensive! when the person told us we all were like so excited and we started taking pics! obviously he wasn't there though. but we were joking, like what if he comes out now? i think we'd all scream! and then miss teng said "and the first person he'll see is MEEE!" and she jumped into the view of the house! :D it was quite insane. and then we were all talking about it until we had TEA at the Jane Austen centre.

oh oh and mrs neoh took us to see PIRATES! it was SO impromptu! cos we were driving past a theatre/cinema and then she said "oh look girls! Shrek! do you want to go see Shrek?" and obviously we all said yes. and we were all really shocked and happy and everything and then i think the day before we went i think Shrek wasn't showing or SOMETHING so she asked if we wanted to see Pirates instead! which was REALLY cool. honestly, i didnt want to go cos i hadnt seen the first 2 and i wasnt really interested. but i went anyway! and it was really good. thanks to sasha and caroline and everyone else who explained the plot of the first 2 to me, i understood it! oh and of course thanks to abby who leaned over and told me what stuff was when it came from the previous 2!

yes, so go watch it. :D and i shall go watch the first 2 sometime soon.

besides that, everything else was really nice. all the scenery was WOW. and the mountains were SOOOO amazing! i love Blencathra, our field studies centre halfway up the mountain. the weather was really cool and the rooms were nice and the showers were fabulous! (at least they didnt spray everywhere but the middle, or have non-adjustable temperatures) and everywhere you looked you see mountains! and sky!

and of course CASTLERIGG! the stone circle! it was so lovely. the atmosphere was just so... woww. and we all heard a plane flying, and all tried to look for it above us, until we realised it was much much lower-just slightly above eye level! thats how high we were! hahha and all the silly sheep who kept baa-ing and ruining mr foster's reading of the poem! :D

all the houses started to look pretty much the same after awhile though! so we kind of got bored. we then began to spend less time looking at the house and more looking at the pretty pretty gardens! i took so many photos of flowers! (: haha. but my favourite house was Rydal Mount. i dont quite know why though. it just.. left an impression on me! :D

well anyway i shall go now, else i'll be here forever! (:

2007-05-20T05:07:00.000+03:00

yo! (:

ohmygosh it was open house yesterday.. it was so tiring and i wasnt even DOING the henna for I&E. okay so, basically from around 9.30+ to 10.40, we were doing the folders, like taking out the old programmes and putting the new ones in. and we found out mr teo's nickname:D haha.

then after that until 12.30, i was mostly running around trying to find the extension cord (which i never found) and trying to get customers for our stall so we wouldnt nmake a loss and actually make a GOOD profit! (: eh not bad okay i managed to find quite alot of them, since somebody else was just talking to her boy-friend most of the time. (observe the hyphen)

yeah then from 12.30 to 2, i was in the spice rooms TRYING to help miss wee with the pupil welfare dept. (peerleaders, etc) but everytime i approached someone, they'd say, its okay; we'll just look around first. or im coming back later, just waiting for the principal's talk. so in the end i only talked to 3 people. but i heard rachellee and shi jie's 'business@school' presentation 11times! i bet i could recite it!

i barely went back to the stall when i realised i had to go do the tours! i suddenly regretted being a SC ambassador): the tours were really boring and i really didnt know how to elaborate cos i was so tired and i just wanted to keep moving! thanks to kristen who came to my rescue& took over some parts. (okay, most parts). :D

i was quite irritated cos my shift was from 2.30-4.30, but since my first tour finished at 3,45-4, i had to wait there until 4.30 and another family came along! so i had to do it. but luckily this time it was only one family, so it was easier to talk to them; although i really had no idea what to say when they asked me what i hate about sc!

yeah so i finished at like 4.4o, then i helped my group clear up a bit, but i had to leave at 5+ for church! (: yay!

yes, so this is why i was so tired yesterday and i really felt like a zombie; but thankfully, sarah soh convinced me to go in front, and sonic edge and their interesting ideas made me feel a little more light-hearted and of course, the spirit of God energised me! (: so i'm so glad i went for church yesterday; especially since i wont be seeing all my cellmates and church people for 27days!! i'm sad): but hopefully i'll have a good trip!

okay well, i shall go now. and PRAY that the take down the banners soon or esther is gonna get SOMEBODY to take photos of it and i will be embarrassed FOREVER!

sigh, you know the programmes yesterday had my face on them! and abby's, and yingyi's and zay's, and her sister's. they even had POSTCARDS! sigh.

okay tatah now! i've got math tuition, then i'm going lit trip shopping! (:

95% happy, 5% something else.

2007-05-13T16:24:00.001+03:00

Hey everyone! (: haha ohmy I havent updated for so LONG! And now, since I’m not computer fasting anymore, I am back! YIPPEE! With my COOL new phone and new number! (: yay!

Oh and sadly, A LOT of people at church have seen the banner! ): what were they all doing near scgs anyway? Hmmm…okay fine so many of them go to schools near there. WHY can’t most of the people in my church be like those in sasha’s church and never come near scgs in their lives??? WHY?

Oh well. Maybe it’ll look good on my resume(:

I love church and my cellmates who always cheer me up and make me think deeper and make me feel GOOD. And then I know that I can get through the week because at the end of it, they’ll be there to make me happy and remind me not to lose faith in God.

Silly sarah soh never come yesterday for service, she missed her best friend! Haha I love you crazy girl<3 And esther who spotted sarah’s best friend! Funny funny people(:

I don’t know what I’m going to be “when I grow up”. I don’t really have an ambition. Once upon a time I wanted to be a teacher. Then an author. And then an author/missionary. Then a pilot. Then a lawyer. And now I just don’t know. Somehow, I always thought whenever something made me think of the future; that God would tell me like SNAP. Although I know he will, everyone says: you need to plan NOW. You need to make the right choices. Are you sure this is what you want to do? AND I DON’T KNOW!

I cant see myself doing any of the above, long-term. No, cant see myself taking carmen’s place in front of 38 pupils, neither can I see myself in some countryside house writing novels with the meadows for inspiration! I can see myself as a missionary; but that is totally dependant on my calling. Like everything else too, I suppose. But I don’t need any qualifications… I cant be a pilot cos well.. I cant do phys! I don’t even take it anymore! Haha. A lawyer.. I’ve always had the idea of doing that although I never really could see myself working as hard as my cousin, or speaking as well as my cool uncle (he was like a Deputy Public Prosecutor!) He’s actually pretty scary sometimes. But the PRESIDENT came to his son’s wedding!! How COOL is that? Oh and the other thing I cant see myself doing? Being the managing and arts director of the esplanade! Like my really RICH but nice uncle. He used to go around the world choosing the shows that came to the esplanade. Until he got PROMOTED. He’s the one who sponsored my family’s trip to paris and London last year.

Thing is, I’m not suited for any one of them. Not the way I am now, at least.

So yeah. I guess I just have to keep praying and do my best in everything I do, so that no matter what I choose to do later on, I know I did all that I could.

Well, anyway, that means that I should probably go study for my math and French tests now. I like French, but honestly, I’m quite tired of it!

I thought you hated me;
and I just shared my heart and soul with you.

2007-04-22T09:18:00.001+03:00

we are under attack, we are in the midst of a spiritual war.

earlier this week, i received an email warning me against a book. this book contains conversations between a "god" and teens, that is completely OUT.

i went to check it out further because somebody had recommended this book to me previously. and when i did, i was so sickened. the author's priniples are totally wrong, and some of the answers given by this "god", are so contrary to everything that God has taught us.

the worst part is, people, as they always do, really think its helping and are buying these books for their teenagers. Sure, the book has some "right" principles, but majority are wrong. the first thing that came to my mind was, "the devil too, can cite scripture for his own purpose". and thats what he's doing, through so many people.

anyone who knows the Bible will know that the quotes are completely out of context. it's just so scary.. its never been quite this real to me that the devil is working so hard. ):

1And I saw an angel coming down out of heaven, having the key to the Abyss and holding in his hand a great chain. 2He seized the dragon, that ancient serpent, who is the devil, or Satan, and bound him for a thousand years. 3He threw him into the Abyss, and locked and sealed it over him, to keep him from deceiving the nations anymore until the thousand years were ended. After that, he must be set free for a short time.

7When the thousand years are over, Satan will be released from his prison 8and will go out to deceive the nations in the four corners of the earth—Gog and Magog—to gather them for battle. In number they are like the sand on the seashore. 9They marched across the breadth of the earth and surrounded the camp of God's people, the city he loves. But fire came down from heaven and devoured them. 10And the devil, who deceived them, was thrown into the lake of burning sulfur, where the beast and the false prophet had been thrown. They will be tormented day and night for ever and ever.

Revelation 1-3;7-10

I'M A CHRISTIAN AND OH-SO-PROUD OF IT!

just keep praying, just keep praying, just keep living to answer His call.

2007-04-07T06:55:00.000+03:00

WHEE(:

yesterday was good friday. i didnt go to church. at first it was because i was supposed to meet for a project, then it was because twin tower said "lets go out!" and it sounded too good to be true! (:

but i did spend some time with God, to meditate and reflect.. and im glad i did. (: anyway im sure He understands..

cos going out CHEERED me UP alot!! i've been feeling really tired and i dont know..down lately. like really endlessly tired. with all the work and everything. and it helped to go CRAZY for awhile. we took lots of mad pictures which i forbade her to put on her blog! and we kept eating and eating(: it was quite a productive outing really.

we managed to buy presents for people whose birthdays are close and also managed to have alot of fun! (: oh and i tried on SO many shoes! which were all not in my size.. haha but still it was fun! there were so many shops with the biggest size being 7!! "they cater to the asian market".

whatever.

i need to go to a country where there are BIG people with BIG feet. seriously.. where there are other people BIGGER than me so mei-e cant call me goliath anymore! (: haha. that day sasha found out from some random fact book that my hands are the same size as goliath..which would mean that he's really inproportionate cos he was over 2m tall! haha. and then some silly person said i look like PETER CROUCH. which apparently is a compliment cos shereen woo wants to marry him! (:

aiyoh.

haha i just thought of last friday when may and danielle fell INLOVE with some tall guy on the bus!! haha they claimed to have seen him wearing the same thing the previous week and then followed him until cheryl and i managed to turn them to taka instead. and then we went to buy Ying's birthday present which danielle forgot to bring until wednesday! sigh.

SASHA MARTINNN is in phuket enjoying herself. and well, studying. she smsed me last night to ask whats tested for a/emath. i dont think i would have bothered if i were her. then again i wouldnt go away in the middle of the term and skip TWO days of school and return at 12plus at night and then come back to sch for amath test the following day! (:

YAY church today. too bad amelia and val cant come. i think val forgot and amelia has tuition): oh well. next time then guys! (:

Faim broke her finger last week. well sort of. dislocated her bone playing softball. oh well. She can take the cast off on monday so thats GOOD(: yay she's coming today i can laugh at her. and with her. (:

haha and im now sarah soh's super tall bridesmaid!!

well i shall go and do ss project now before samantha fu comes to murder me.. oh and by the way, KATRINA, VAL AND LYDIA: I STILL DONT HAVE THE PASSWORD TO THE BIO BLOG. faster faster faster!!

(:

2007-03-29T15:00:00.000+02:00

lalalalala well i had my prayer answered. I've been not-as-busy and bogged down this week compared to the last few. Either that or i've just gotten used to it!

GONNA DIE GONNA DIE GONNA DIE FOR FRENCH CONTROLE!!!! bleah i wanna do well for once!! ):

i have been studying, by the way. I dont get why my teacher insists that subjonctif is really hard...unless there's this whole other part we havent heard of. its pretty much like the hardness of futur proche.

i've realised that the series of emotions i cover every week are basically pretty much the same, with minor variations from tests and other things. it goes something like this:
MONDAY: huh? only first day of school? got 4DAYS more leh.. wanna slack, want holidays!
TUESDAY:ugh french. only tuesday? well, tomorrow wednesday, halfway point coming soon.
WEDNESDAY: halfway point! halfway point! ohno got tuition): i can make it through the week!
THURSDAY: aiyah french again. never mind. after that got 4 days before french again. YAY tomorrow's friday! almost there!
FRIDAY: HAHAHAHAH fridays here! guides...okay lah not bad can talk t abby and may and slack. OHNO what if its footdrill? forget it lah. TOMORROW'S saturday! cell! cell! service! service! (and now: F4! F4! haha oh gosh we rock) last day! I MADE IT!!

hahaha yeah thats my week. (:

well yesterday was a slightly different wednesday though thankfully! cos my tuition teacher got sick so i didnt have t go home so early for tuition. So after the rain slowed down a bit, nat and i decided t go t island creamery! (: and nice nice nice ck gave us a lift cos she was passing by. and she was so shocked that i wore the seatbelt! hahah.

yeah so we actually studied and got work done! i'm so proud of myself. i managed to finish all my homework before my dad came to pick us up. i love island man! (: oh and i think nat's blog add is so FUNNY(: when she told me i laughed! haha but i know it wasnt supposed t be funny! i'm, sorry natt(:

oh and i'm SO COOL(: i started the colourful scotch tape trend in 3gy!! yay i'm a TRENDSETTER!! ahaha.

oh today was the stupid Emergency Exercise thing! and we had to go sit in the HOT field for like a LONG TIME. and i think all the sc primary people hate me cos i was supposed t tell them t squat down and not stand up although there are like 2ANTS. so scary, yes? Ahh. well yeah so i was getting quite irriated cos there was this girl who was just standing there and filing her nails and ignoring me although it was so obvious that she knew i was talking to her. UGH. and they're like what? p3? p5?

serriously. and then when i was walking back to class i heard some primary schooler go "there, that one" to her friend and then proceed to glare at me. I just kept walking. ):

anyway, GOOD NEWS: val and amelia may be coming to church on 7th april!! maybe i can bring them for cell outing if its on. no one ever tells me anything! hurh.

well okay. i shall go now and watch news so i can improve on ss! i wonder whats happening with the T. T. Durai trial?

:D

2007-03-23T15:22:00.000+02:00

busybusybusybusybusybusybusy.

thats all that i've been. OHMYGOLLY is this just the first week of term2? feels like forever! it dragged on and on and drained me completely. i learnt how to fall asleep with my eyes open this week. i also learnt that big beige lizards with stripy tails think debra's legs are sexxy! XD

been so starved for good music. and today when i came home, the only thing i wanted to listen to was something related to God! so im listening to planet shakers now. its really stress-relieving(: yay.

I GOT INTO LIT TRIP!!! :D

yay! i am so happy! i dont care if its going to be really tough and we'll have tutorials everyday the whole day! i'm gonna have fun and THATS IT. (: thank God for this opportunity and for the great teachers who are leading it!

i love GOD, don't you?

i've been so grateful to God lately cos i havent been deserving to even pass some of my tests, for the effort i put in, but yet God still lets me pass, sometimes do better than i expect. I haven't failed anything yet! (: i'm also happy cos i've been remembering not to swear so much and do the right thing although i want to do otherwise. and remember to THANK GOD.

fong sent me this sms that day:

If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
Happy moments, praise God.
Difficult moments, seek God
Quiet moments, worship God
painful moments, trust God
every moment, thank God.

im trying to follow this, cos i think its the right way to go! also carmen's sms:

honour God in your thoughts, actions and TIME and i'm sure God's grace and goodness will overflow.

i hadnt been doing much of those, yet God still helped me through everything last year and in the beginning of this year. The LEAST i can do is to honour Him in all i do. i'm trying really hard!

tomorrow's saturday! Church! YAY! (: finally! cell, craziness and laughter. although thats nothing compared to hearing the word of God and hearing from Him. and worhsipping Him together with other passionate youths!! the feeling is just indescribable. (believe me, i tried)

well thats it for now then! (: take care people! and dont get disheartened! take small steps. take each day as it comes. ( but study in advance!)

thank you all you wonderful people who brighten my day and cheer me up and make me happy again! <3

2007-03-04T10:15:00.000+02:00

whahahaha im back from obs!!

and not only did i survive, i had FUN!!

okay its not fun while i was doing it..but looking back and thinking about it and the experience and EVERYTHING. i love it! ahaha i love my watchmates! COOK! the best name man! hahaha and my instructor was actually really nice! his name was LJ but we called him algae/algay!

i shall tell you ALL about it!

DAY ONE: we arrived at camp 2! i thought the store looked really gross.. and i was kinda freaked out cos this lizard ran past me into the BACK place. haha but oh well i wouldn't be freaked out now!

okay okay then we had capsize drill thing.. and we were carrying the kayak and then somehow everyone decided to let go but didnt tell me so i ended up scraping my hand on the road.. and it hurt ALOT for such a TINY thing. well then we were supposed to swing 3 times before capsizing and sam only swung TWICE so i was like totally unprepared! but i made it anyway. and then sam and i and zihan and vic were like always the first two kayaks! haha it was super fun except that i was stuck trying to get on the kayak after we capsized in the middle of the ocean! but yes i made it eventually..

AND oh man i could see my house from the sea so it totally sucked cos i was so near yet so far! haha and we "sailed into the sunset"..

lol. i didn't know camps gave such JUNK food. like seriously. not wholesome or whatever! haha. but we thought it was very little. in the end we had to distribute and bring home! haha.

i didnt want to go to the toilet to shower cos of the LONG queue so joan and i changed at the rock wall using her pillowcase thing and then showered at the wash-up area! but unlike smart lydia, teri, bobo and gladys, we kept all our clothes on! hahah.

didnt sleep well cos its unfamiliar environment and everything. alhtough that was probably the most comfortable night.

DAY TWO: we hiked over to camp1. it was fairly okay except that we kept stopping so it was more tiring. although in relation to the weight of my bag, it was quite easy! (: camp1 is like SO resort-like there's even a swimming pool which duh we arent allowed to touch.. but there was AIRCON at the instructors place.. sam left cos of her knee. poor girl.

we went to learn how to belay properly and i couldnt really do it cos i kept forgetting to LOCK. but oh well it was okay.. the scary mid-element thing was quite okay in the end. i thought i would totally DIE or something but yeah i made it across the first two. i fell off the third one lah but still it was okay. i think zay almost flew cos of the sudden weight! WHOOPS. but anyway, she had anchors!

then we were briefed about sea ex! i was so worried. there was like this cold fear somehow. not exactly sure why. but i was sort of scared we wouldnt make it in time i guess. and that i wouldnt be able to handle the kayaking for so long..

anyway, we pitched our tents and fell asleep! it was actually a pretty good sleep lah except some people from the other watch were quite noisy! haha

DAY THREE: we woke up on time and managed to leave in good time. it was quite tough at first cos me and zay were supposed to be left marker and the fleet was quite sprawled out. and people were having problems keeping within the boundary. but in the end we managed to keep it fairly orderly and there weren't so many people going outside.

then we turned into the river and i was so worried that i wouldn't be able to stern rudder enough cos my hands were so freaking tired!! but i did! haha and we didnt get stuck in any branches! yay us! and we made it across the swamp and everything. i got stuck in the mud so much that i had to use both hands to pull my shoe out of it. and then they asked for someone to go over the other side and bail out water. so i was like going to go down and then algay went 'aiyah just mud only! free spa!' and rubbed a handful of mud on my face!! ): bleargh. so gross. anyway i went in the other side and had to swim in the swamp and hold on to the kayaks!

finally arrived at the scary, ulu campsite with the NO TRESSPASSING sign. put all our stuff up and then went to HEAVEN in the midst of hell! the wonderful quarry!! we just like floated there for a long time and ate oranges and whatever. and then i was uh okay.. chatting about someone to abby and then all of a sudden she screamed, " DAVINIAAAAAA!!" and i was pushed underwater by BIRIN. so irritating!! hahah but yeah i didnt swallow that much water! (:

anyway sadly after that we had to pitch our tents in the pouring rain and we were freaking shivering like crazy!! It was so cold and we were dripping wet so every time the wind changed direction we’d hug ourselves and shiver!! And screech “wind change direction! Wind change direction!” especially me, zihan and abby(: HAHA.

it was really difficult and we were really discouraged cos there seemed to be no hope anyways, the tents were already flooding and kept falling over. We had nothing to DO, to keep warm. So like around 7 of us formed a circle and held hands to keep warm and started praying very very hard for the rain to stop and that we’d be more comfortable again. Then we all went under a poncho and tried to keep warm on body heat. After awhile there were too many of us so abby and I found another poncho and split away from the group. We ended up under the tarp-roof listening to ghost stories by the un-scary Carmen. Haha.

the instructors were really nice cos they made us HOT milo so we could be warmer! Although it was too hot to drink(: but it did help somewhat. And the rain stopped for awhile to let us cook (THANK GOD!! J) and for us to make our way back to our campsite amidst the grunts of boars and croaks of bullfrogs and whatever else! I was so scared my gosh I wanted to CRY and give up. Thank Carmen and jean for being SO nice and walking on either side of me although they were scared too. I LOVE you guys! <3. anyway, we managed to change to something drier in the tent, although it wasn’t much help cos throughout the night, water was dripping through the top of the tent and INTO my shirt and I was lying in a reservoir.

HAHA and one of my watchmates was so SMART she wore her underwear to sleep cos she had not enough dry pants.. and in the middle of the night LJ came to check on us! hahaha so funny. I wonder if he even realized cos it was so dark and I think he’d be more concerned about whether we were able to sleep(: I only managed to sleep 2 hours, but somehow God carried me through the next day.

and this is the story as told by Lydia: TWO of our watchmates suddenly got their period in the middle of the night so in the early hours of the morning-when we were all mostly awake anyway-lydia and gladys had to go find pads! So they had to ask LJ! And the conversation was somewhat like this:

lydia&gladys: algay! Do you have pad??
LJ: pad? P-A-D?
lydia&gladys: yeah.
LJ: girls asking guy for a pad? What is the world coming to!

HAHHAHHA.
Oh I can just imagine.

DAY FOUR: I tell you this was a relief. The night was over!! YIPPEE! We cleared up everything and got ready to hike back to the LUXURIOUS camp2 as soon as we could! Most of us skipped breakfast-which meant more weight in my haversack, but less time wasted-and still in the rain, walked to the instructors tent area.

After a last check at the campsite, we left (thank God) for camp2. The walk was a little tiring but I think we were all so motivated to get back quickly to the land of toilets and roofs, that we managed to reach pretty quickly and were not so tired.

Basically the day from there on, was quite slack. We played some key punch game and a mass skipping thing where the whole group has to skip as many times as possible. It was quite funny lah. Not that interesting, but not bad! It was a break from everything else.

Then we had to wash stores and account for all our equipment which was actually quite tiring. I mostly stayed at the sinks, so I didn’t have to walk back and forth much. Anyway, we ended up with the right amount of equipment in the end, so we didn’t have to pay for anything! Yay! Haha.

That night we slept under a ROOF. The mph. it felt good! We used the dry poncho as a blanket and managed to actually sleep well. I think it was the second best night of sleep, the best being the second night. Also, we were all very tired, which is also probably why the instructors let us have a slack day!

DAY FIVE: Going home day! Ahah. We were all really in the “we’re leaving” mood and everyone was considerably more cheerful and HAPPY. The first thing we did was the COOL jetty jump that was really fun although I was worried that there might be a jellyfish! Ahaha. We had to stand at this plank-like thing and then say our commitment and then take a big step off into the sea. My commitment was to be more tolerant of people. I think i’ve succeeded so far. Yeah anyway it was really fun. Except I was wondering why I was taking to long to resurface and I think I breathed in water! Oh well. It was still fun.

And I said a final goodbye to my faithful school shoes! HAHA

We had breakfast and sang our song to LJ, before having morning circle and doing the journal stuff. And I was taking random pictures with my disposable camera! Haha I now know how to turn the thing(:

Then we had the FINAL debrief. We all presented our certificates to each other and got a piece of string from the web thing, when we shared about obs experience. And then LJ played the “high” song which I thought was so nice and is now my favourite song! haha cos it reminds me of everything at obs, the good mostly. And he read us the poem that he wrote. Its quite good actually and I thought it made a lot of sense. It was nice of him to.

Yeah well then we just had a final official goodbye as a cohort and they called us to go on the boat by classes..

And OBS WAS OVER.

It was a really good experience and I’m glad I went. Glad I didn’t give up, and glad for the chance. I would do it all again if I had to, because it was utterly worth it. And now, everything makes me obs-sick! haha. Well. Back to school work now. TEST, TESTS and more TESTS.

YOOOOOO!!

2007-02-25T08:34:00.001+02:00

AAAHHHHHHHH!!! OBS tomorrow!!! )=

iamgoingtodie. and it is not helping that i am carrying a HUGE bag that is going to make me look like i am travelling for 10days!! ): bah. should i carry the smaller one?? but i dont think its enough... sigh.

i like to worry so i am seriously worrying.. : do i have enough? :do i have too much? :is that all? did i forget anything? :is my packing convenient to take out stuff? :am i going to DIE?

bleagh.

"be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and petition..."

help God help!!

okayyy. well i think i will take the small backpack! HAHAH.

yesterday was fun! went early to meet twin tower to chat.. we didnt really talk that much.. just a little. we sorta ended up reading fairy tales and dumb optical illusions in the library! haha. but still it felt nice!

then at cell we were doing the qt thing again. i must be more diligent.. i think our cell is sort of regressing to the old cell stage. we need to BOND more =) cant go for archery next wk.. although not much point since practically no one is going!

service was sort of different. not sure how.. felt pretty bad cos i was chatting through alot of the sermon): sigh. i must pay more attention.. missed sarah soh and her asthma attacks! ahaha. love you dear<3!

dinner was pretty uneventful except for the Qinwei song.. esther's supposed to put the video on youtube! hahaha.

well. i shall go and pack now. small bag i think. how did lydia stuff all her things into a BADMINTON BAG?? oh well technically im not too sure exactly how big a badminton bag is. but still. see you when im back from obs! not tooo BLACK i hope..

wish me luck! actually, pray for me!

runningsofast,youdontturnback.ifyou'donlyslowdow you'dseemewaitingforyou.wishingyou'dstoptoo.

watching and waiting.

2007-02-20T07:18:00.001+02:00

i'm getting mad at people because they dont bother to try to become closer to God..and i'm struggling so much and they're just enjoying themselves, not caring about it at all. what would you call it? jealous?selfish?unreasonable?haughty? im sorry. i should be praying for them, not getting so frustrated that i push them into DANGERZONE..

friday went shopping with the nonyas! sam wasnt there as usual! eug and charis and terry came after sasha and i, and left before sasha and i. so it was basically sasha and i. sigh. wasnt very satisfactory shopping though. i still want heels. i saw a NICE pair yesterday, but they only had BRIHGT GOLD in my size. and i dont think it goes with much. anyway, short people, heels dont make that much difference okay! and its just the FACT that they're heels. not that i want to be any taller. I found a perfect pair for sasha. what.6,8 inch platforms?? ahaha.

i have been eating alot. had a sort of reunion dinner on sat.. i baked! haha im not such a loser who blows up the kitchen! im the one who people say "you should sell your stuff" to! HAHA yay me.

went for a fabulous buffet yesterday at the miramar hotel to treat this friend of my parents for her 83rd birthday! and she's still so fit! haha i ate super super ALOT. i need a spectacular exercise regime to make me prepared for obs! or else im just gonna COLLAPSE and DIE.. i hope i'll survive..everyone says its okay but then they're all like ATHLETIC people, not UNFIT like me!! ): well..God will see me through.

i need to buy stuff for obs.. i dont know what type of bag to carry.. anybody know?? help those who came back alr! sms me or sth! like so i wont be STUCK!! yay haha thank you!!

pfftt..i shall go now! and study for lit and ss although i have no idea how.. bah. i want the LOOOONGGG end-year holidays again!! sigh. well..off now! (:

should i? should i not? should i? well..its not a matter of life and death is it?

2007-02-15T14:36:00.000+02:00

i know i cant survive without God-and i'm not going to try.

who would comfort me? who would love me? who would reassure me? who would encourage me? it always God. maybe through other people, but just trace it back-to God.

this week was pretty tiring. its amazing that i didnt have any tests.. i'm so thankful for that. and that i've made it to this point. and that there's a recharge, the 4-5 day break. i need to spend more time with God..after all He's done for me, is this all i can do in return?? 30+ min a day-not even regularly..

early this week i had a number of chinese periods.. so i went to the library. And i took the school bible and sat in one corner and just reflected. prayed and read. i couldnt worship of course, so i spent some time doing it those nights. it got me through the day honestly. i felt God so strongly and His love for everyone around me in school and i just couldn't stop praising His name.

i even almost ended up late for class. lucky it was break so i arrived just as the teacher did.

vday was so fun(: i got so many presents compared to last year! and more flowers! yeah as dan said-its so nice to know that there are so many people who care about you enough to give you something on valentine's day. be it katrina's melting jelly or lydia's flower, or sasha's card.. it doesnt matter because they were all given in love and it really is the thought that counts, isn't it?

i think i didnt screw up the skit as badly as i thought i would! i could be heard! yay i basically blocked out the audience. i asked God to help me feel as though we were rehearsing, and He did. it felt normal. alhtough i was pretty nervous. heh..

curtain duty tmr! if i dont like you, the curtain closes! wahahahah.. (=

cant wait to go SHOPPING! i seriously need retail therapy.. shops..shops..clothes.. haha

thank you so much dan for staying back with me and talking to me.. i thank God so much for you. i love you so much darling<3. it's okay. i'll be praying for you always. You are indeed beautiful inside-out. (=

twin tower!! i miss you!<3 go out okay?? and i believe you have a long overdue letter addressed to me??? (= haha.

i enjoy church now. church pple make me go HIGH and feel so happy.. thanks all of you who made me laugh till my jaws hurt last week! i am so blessed to have you guys!

take care okay, everyone? God is watching out for you!

"FEAR NOT FOR I AM WITH YOU," SAYS THE LORD.

"I NEVER SAID A SPARROW WOULD NOT FALL, BUT I DID PROMISE THAT YOU WOULD NEVER FALL WITHOUT THE FATHER."

2007-02-07T15:15:00.000+02:00

not even at home yet.
waiting for my uncle to drive me home.
went all the way home to find out i had to go half the way back. isn't that dumb?

that day i told someone-i think it was sam-i love wednesdays cos they mean that i've made it through half the week and i can survive the rest of it.
i didn't realise how true that actually was.

i shall still be alive at the end of the week.

2007-02-05T14:50:00.000+02:00

WAH..last week was SOOOO tiring. okay so i only had 4 tests, but im not used to working!! HAHA. i miss slacking..

haha i saw joey in sch last monday and today! badminton comp-our schls hosting it.. haha she was so blur last week and i had t drag natyeo and jy all around the 2nd floor of the hall to yell at her..in the end she saw me and then i realised i had nothing to say but "hi" and stuff about how the match was and "see you on sat!". (:

sam says we cant have ice-skating cca!! ): i wanted to learn!! but she says tt she can still teach me on fridays after i finish Guides(: YAY!

french last week was quite okay. thurs jy and i almost reached there at break!! cos she had higher chinese thing and i was waiting for her(: i'm SO nice! haha. then at one point the teacher was like "did you all watch yesterdays match?" and then we all said yes, except like jy and one of the cedar girls..cant rmb who. and all the guys started talking ALOT ALOT about football..HAHA. and ais and i were talking about it too! (: until the madame lee was like "enough!!"

i havent failed anything yet!! i'm so HAPPY! i was SO sure i failed amath! but cos of the 4 free marks i passed!! by 1 mark..(: yay typos! :D

AND I PASSED TOPO!! finally! i will get my bronze soon!! SOON!

i was so grateful when sat finally came! i woke up really late(: i went to meet eunice and joey half an hour before cell.. and this silly eunice came early cos she thought cell started at 3! (: HAHA. we were sitting in hawker talking nonsense and shooting the small milk biscuit thing at each other.(it has some chinese or chinese brand name:D) cell was fun lah. we played the 2truths-1lie thing that i just played w my peer charges last week! (OHNO i havent passed them their letters!!) apparently everybody knows my height so most pple got it right. except CARMEN and i dont know who else(:

mine were: i hav 5 pairs of sch socks
i am 1.76m tall
i used to go to The British School

very obvious meh?(:

at service i got hit in the eye by a flying m&m like thing.. and i made the huge mistake of letting sarah write on me cos i thought i told her nothing BAD.. haha she wrote "I LIKE BOYS" hugely, across my left arm in pink zig marker!! ): and i was like OH MY GOLLY and i found this sock (??) in my bag which i used to frantically scrub at it until it wasnt obvious! (: HAHA. so scary lah this woman. it doesnt sound that bad perhaps but if you were me, it WAS.

i was slacking sunday mostly except for a little studying of bio...i just couldn't study. watched part of the match(: haha dont know why but been very interested in singapore's matches nowadays. (and its NOT eye candy okay!!) shall go and become a pro footballer. HAHA right. i cant even KICK the ball. okay i can but not properly. not in the direction i want it to go!! (:

baking for vday w jy and maybe sasha! (: yay.

okay.. i will go and sleep so i can grow more! (: haha kidding. no i'm actually praying i'll stop growing. PRAY for me! i NEVER NEVER EVER wanna reach 1.8m!! pray i'll shrink to AT LEAST 1.75. 3cm. worthy ambition, no?

God bless!

i know You'll always be there. the symbolism of everything thats been happening is actually quite startling.

thank You for forgiving me, i hope she will too. SO insensitive.

2007-02-02T14:55:00.000+02:00

tired.tired.tired.
stressed.stressed.stressed.
what are we coming to?

drained, tired and hurting.

2007-01-21T05:37:00.000+02:00

okay i really cannot be bothered to blog nowadays.. once a week is my max..and i try to keep it my minumum too. this week was better than the last. it went by quite quickly and i didnt feel so much energy being drained out of me. maybe i'm getting more used to upper sec! its actually quite interesting and lessons are getting better.. i am SO glad i took bio and not phys, and i'm also glad i didnt take trip, cos i think i wouldn't be able to manage. i'm not as pro as junyan! 10subjects! whoah.

and i have good teachers really. my teachers: hist/ss:mrs wang- she's a Christian! and really nice too.

eng and lit: miss hu-she's got a TWIN! so cool! and she's a Christian too. and she's quite young(:

chem:mr lau-haha. he gets carried away. ALOT. its impossible to sleep during his class actually.

bio:mr johari-he's very very funny and more often than not my jaw muscles ache from laughing after his class.

addmath:mrs chan-she's quite nice but i think she thinks we're all quite slow in addmath!

emath:mr tee-he's okay lah.

french:madame lee-she's good cos she speaks to us in French, so we get better. but she led to my doing that EMBARRASSING dialogue last week! ): ahhhh! so embarrassing!

yes, so you see i am very blessed! and the SC cell is up and running proper. so many people said they wanted to come, but friday only saw 6 students at the amphi. well. its a good start to this year. we may be going mission trip together at the end of the year! not confirmed. to india-duh. my parents will lead probably.

Friday was prefects' invest! i was doing backstage with the other guides people. yay well done prefects! you guys rock!! (: honestly, they did so well, if you didn't go, HAHA. (excluding sasha) i think i was more nervous than the prefects! i was so worried i would screw up the screen part-like hold it too far back or i would be obviously seen while changing hand or sth. But no one said anything. so i'll just take it that it went okay! (:

it was fun! i'd do backstage again if i had the chance!

yesterday was church! YAY! cell was good, we did word from the purpose driven life, where we stopped last year! then there was baptism service! yay some people i know were getting baptised! 6 or sth like that! congratulations you guys! especially to p3! haha. then pastor michael ross preached..i think he's my favourite preacher cos he's really interesting and he speaks on alot of relevant issues! cool! (: haha he spoke on The Cross. short sermon cos he was trying to finish on time.

oh and we went for dinner with a very interesting personality..a French personality. one who did 3 backflips in the sanctuary. fascinating eh? haha

well..back t sch tmr! must finish hmwk!

2007-01-13T05:24:00.000+02:00

hello.

school. really still the first week of school. so why am i so tired?!? i know i must work MUCH harder this year or else i'll be totally lost and probably fail my o's. BAH. really, really missing the holidays. even school last year at this time..wasnt so HARD. i guess its another major transition from lower sec, and especially since i didnt work hard last year, so i'm feeling it more):

supposed to be doing commonwealth essay now.

what does slavery mean to you?

its a hard question, undeniably. but its an interesting one too. and i already have the 'spark' of an idea. "Between worlds" isn't bad either and i can think of what i want to write, but SO MANY people are doing it! so i'll probably get really low marks again-like last year):

sigh. i'm also still in shock. i can't believe it, don't want to believe it. i keep rereading it over and over again and keep asking people over and over again. its always still true. it doesn't even affect me directly, yet it pains me so deeply. LORD!! couldn't you have stopped it??

ahh.

guides yesterday. it was okay actually. danielle, kim, aishah and wern ching managed t figure out the desert scenario finally. except the matchstick part-which no one i know has, except for Tammie. then we were supposed to be doing our national heritage badge, but no one told us exactly what to do so..well. What do you get when you place sec3's in a computer lab, with no clear instructions??

me, abby, cherylL, may and danielle created a myspace account. we're a HOT 20 year old gay guy. HAHAH.

we finally got started on the project though. did you know there are 54 monuments in Singapore??!! honestly. my eyes were hurting from all the reading...

footdrill. oh my GOLLY (haha i did NOT swear!!) my marching sucks!! i kept whacking people. haha especially gwen and shayne): whoops. SORRY! no no no i do not want to be in marching contingent!! how DARE they make it "compulsory"!! i'm always right marker somemore! CANNOT CANNOT):

haha at least i know which is left and right and i DO know how to fall out okay!!

was supposed t go waffle w them but my dad came t fetch me and take me to some weird place in choa chu kang for dinner w my aunt. oh well. next week! no, next next week! next week is prefects' invest! im doing backstage(: so cool i want to see all the prefects making a fool of themselves! :D

jun yan and i missed the bus to french fair cos i stayed back for backstage thing on thurs): SORRY jy!! haha so we went to class and it was only the 2 of us cos all the ri guys were away at obs and the cedar girls went to the fair thing. in the end we just asked the teacher if we could go home and do self-study! she said yes. hahah YAY.

aiyah the ri guys will be back next week): no more peace. and i shall begin to feel stupid again. I bet they actually study french twice a week during the holidays. UGH. ):

oh well. at least im better than sasha. who really is 1/8 french so HAHA.

well..off now. going for lunch then cell (yay) and then service:D oh no then sunday then MONDAY school again!! ahhh. chem prac on tues. ): i hate prac.

it is only saturday. it is only saturday. it is only saturday. it is only saturday. it is only saturday. it is only saturday. it is only saturday. it is only saturday. it is only saturday. it is only saturday.

bye! <3

2007-01-06T06:20:00.000+02:00

i should just give up blogging. i cant be bothered.

school started this week. Tiring. Peerleading is okay(: just hav t listen to all the stupid lectures that we already listened to in sec one. Some peerleaders actually fell asleep:D i have so many male teachers this year! like 3!! i only had one in sec one and like last year...i dont think i had any...i have 3 now!!! bio, math and chem/co-op. bio teacher is nice, quite funny. The other two are..heh.

lazy lazy lazy. dont wanna study!! wanna go on HOLIDAY again:D

i'm quite lost in my class cos like 89% of my class is from sc primary and i dont know them very well. But its okay, they're nice people as far as i know. Sitting next t another TALL person who's very nice. and behind another nice person. don't really know everyone else around me. But sec3 promises to be interesting. just hope i survive.

well. i'm in carmen's cell! (: yay haha.

thats it then.

what's happening?? helpless, hopless, crazy panic. AHHHHHHH. just wanna scream.

2006-12-31T11:39:00.000+02:00

AWWW. i went to watch eragon with twin tower today. I was SO disappointed. i kept going on and on about how the book is way better-thanks for putting up with me, twin tower! (: i mean everyone said it was lousy, but THIS lousy? man i didn't expect it. I thus prove that you should always watch a movie before reading the book cos 10 out of 10 times i've been disappointed by the movie version of a awesome book i've read. like this time. the movie totally didn't do any justice to christopher paolini's book. it didn't capture any of the magic or any ESSENCE that was the basis of the book, and that made the book so FABULOUS. ): yes, i am VERY disappointed. they condensed it so much that it was so confusing. and throughout the show, esther only caught one name-eragon. And they didn't even intro Orik or show isidar mithrim which i wanted to see): and angela the herbalist didn't even tell his fortune properly. and what about Katrina?? okay fine if they put all the details in it would be way too long, but even so.. then they can't make eldest properly if ever they decide to. and the whole thing happened in 2DAYS. how did eragon learn magic?? and learn how to fight? you cant kill a shade after just losing to Brom. seriously.
so disappointed, so disappointed. so disappointing.
really.
dont read the book until you've watched the movie-so you wont be disappointed.
the only thing right was that Arya was pretty enough. even then, hello! in the book, she only revealed her identity as princess in ELDEST. and they never mentioned she was an elf. gosh.
leave out all the neccessary details yeah?
but Saphira was quite well done. but HEY!! saphira is the name of Brom's dragon!! she chose the name when eragon asked her, after hearing it from Brom. She didn't just pop up and say, i'm saphira. and they totally didnt explain the gëdwey ignasia. ):
you see what i mean about i went on and on??
dont watch movies with me unless they're critiqued to be super good and definitely not based on books. :D well i dont blame the producers since its super hard to produce a good movie from a totally excellent book. i highly doubt i could have done anywhere as good as that. just saying that i personally dont like the movie. So please dont sue me okay? thanks. (:
okay okay i shall go now.
my recommendation is to READ ERAGON AND ELDEST. but you can watch it too if you want. please dont sue me producers. its my personal opinion.
thank you and have a nice day(:

2006-12-29T15:58:00.000+02:00

I can't imagine my life without God.
Actually, without God, i'm not sure i''d still be living it.

2006-12-25T05:50:00.000+02:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!
you know, its Christmas today, i shouldn't be on the COMPUTER. what am i doing here anyway? --.oh thats right- I'M TRYING TO ESCAPE THE CRAZY ZOO THAT YESTERDAY WAS MY HOUSE.
heh heh christmas stress. seriously. i was rudely awakened at 7 am (after sleeping at 2) by the sound of POTS falling and a shrill scream from my aunt, about a cockroach that turned out to be DUST.
so i drag myself out of bed, seeing as its IMPOSIBLE to go back to sleep, and then i bang into my aunt who fairly shrieks, "HURRY HURRY!! GOT ALOT TO DO!" so i hurry, thinking of tonight's gathering and enter the kitchen to see my dad calmly drinking coffee and my aunt standing next to him, panicking. (my mom went to help get ready the stuff for church lunch which i am not going for) and i sigh and sit down to eat breakfast-until i get chased out for my aunt to "arrange the cutlery" ??? and from my room for my dad to move all the unneccessary furniture from the hall and believe me, you dont want to know about the hall.
so i peacefully come to the computer, seeing as nobody wishes to tell me HOW i can help and i sit here and check emails, post and send ecards to people in India. sigh. My dysfunctional family christmas(:
haha. anyway. enough about my morning. i've just read "eldest" again and i realise how much i actually LOVE the series. its one(two) of the best books i've read in awhile. too bad i cant write like that. ): oh well. anyway, if you haven't read it, DO! eragon and eldest. books 1 and 2 of the Inheritance trilogy by Christopher Paolini. He hasn't written the 3rd one yet, or i would have read it. :D
HARK! i hear a call from my panicky aunt-hang on-whew. she only wanted me to wipe the forks. (and spoons) yesterday she wanted me to stand on the kitchen counter and tell her if the table was straight?!?! seriously. anyway...carmen met her. yeah she came with me when i went to send carmen off on sat. she's a very interesting lady(:
yes, so where was i? oh read those books OKAY?? (: haha. i havent watched the movie, but i dont have much faith in movies based on books. Hope this one can change my mind. :D
AHAHAH!! i have found something HELPFUL to do! i shall change the curtains! (: haha okay then. this has been interesting! MERRY CHRISTMAS again and HAPPY NEW YEAR in case i dont post before then!
and GOD BLESS!

torn-half on, half off. People start to hate, to despise, to discriminate. Nobody gets what they deserve.

2006-12-20T15:11:00.000+02:00

whoa its been awhile since i came here. i've been to india and back-for those of you who are either very blur or have been living under a rock.
i dont really feel like talking about my trip for reasons unknown to me (and hence to you), so all i shall say is that it was really awesome and great and i have no idea why i came back. (: i would have preferred not to, really. i'm sure all of you know how much i love india, so no surprise yeah? :D i guess i'm back for all of YOU, singaporeans. so APPRECIATE IT!
haha. haven't really been feeling myself lately. like ystd. i was being so weird to someone on msn. i was like freaking out and acting so wierdly but trying to sound normal and it just sounded like i was a weirdo. and i felt so stupid.
i think its thinking about you-know-who. i've got alot to think about and its all very confusing. since i've been back. thankfully, just when i thought i couldn't take it anymore, God sends Carmen with that word and her lovely personality to make it temporarily better. And i know i can confide in her..i just don't know how. i hope i can be ready soon, because alot depends on it.
anyway...its Christmas on Monday. i'm feeling very excited actually. for once. i cant wait to see david, mala and ashley. (cousin, wife and daughter) i guess i got attached to them during those 2 weeks i stayed with them in india. haha i miss ashleys nonsensical sentences and expressions of love. she's really sweet (she's two), she'll just come and hug your legs and say "ashley loves aka (tamil for elder sister)" and she's also absoloutely in love with Harry Potter. as in, daniel radcliffe. HAHA. she'll say "wanna carry harry potter" and like at some random part of the day, "wanna see harry potter" . (: mala is prepared for a intellectual son-in-law. (: (like David she claims).. well it certainly doesn't run in the family!
haha i've ended up talking about my trip after all. and i feel happier. sigh. its so confusing.
what is?
everything.
what can you do?
nothing. just trust in God.
and thats what you should do.
i know. but why does it seem so difficult?
i cant answer that. can you?
this was supposed to be a happy post, but i dont know what happened. what do YOU think? you have no clue, right?
that's what my life feels like.

when everything seemed fine, you turned it around again, turned it around, sent me spinning. You give me hope that comes with hurt, dreams that come with pain, and everything i didn't need. But i love it. and i love you. so help me.

2006-11-18T06:20:00.000+02:00

you know suprisingly holidays are quite interesting so far.. so much so that i've always got something to do, which is more interesting than blogging!! (: haha. tried doing a blogskin but i gave up cos i dont understand the html thingies and whatever. (:
my birthday FINALLY came.. haha. doesn't feel any different since my brain already registered i was fourteen ages ago! (: i spent my bday first with my aunt and my dad, then later i met eug and charis..they stayed over(: YAY. haha. too bad sasha's away, terry had class chalet and sam was uncontactable-as usual. ): she's MISSING IN ACTION.. so it was just the 3 of us! charis was almost an hour late-as expected. so we waited at starbucks (ooh lovely coffee) and then just gave up and went t ntuc t get the stuff while waiting for her. We had an extremely interesting dinner- mac&cheese, cocktail sausages, fried chicken.. our breakfast was nicer- scrambled eggs, leftover cocktail sausages, new england clam chowder. interesting yeah? we'll die if we stay alone):
we attempted the makeover thing-halfheartedly. and fully gave up when 1. I turned into PAUL TWOHILL. (courtesy of eug and also my new haircut!!) 2. my eyes became singapore's new water supply. (courtesy of MASCARA) 3. we protested at the playing of "chasing cars" (courtesy of the jonathan-crazy charis) and 4. PRISON BREAK was on! (courtesy of channel 5, mediacorp)
we ate hershey's semi-sweet chocolate chips, played othello (which eug sucks at), while watching prison break. (: can you believe we were going to sleep at like 12 plus!! seriously. we were too lazy to watch videos so we just kept err..BONDING(: haha. talking lah. about everything and anything. we also discussed theology-whether speaking in tongues was wrong. and other stuff like that! then we realised tt everytime i hav a sleepover we end up talking about God, (NOT a bad thing, but sleepovers are meant to be carefree and girly etc..) so we changed the subject!
i say not bad, since we managed to sleep only at 3.30. and this time, charis only slept after we all decided to sleep! we woke up at 10.40 and had breakfast at 11.15 after all the "cooking". we watched some painted house thingy?? sth like tt! there wasnt much time before eug's mom came and charis took a lift from her, so we said goodbye!! ):
haha we'll meet again at the next bday.. sasha's?? i think so.. and eug and i shall have a mocha frap again(:and her highness the MARTINI will be here t celebrate with us! yay. haha i love birthdays..
i was so happy tt so many people remembered my bday and smsed me, and jun yan even sent me a e-card that was set to send on 16th although she was away in shanghai! so sweet(: so thanks everybody who wished me!! you guys ROCK(: i love you!
whoosh im getting sentimental! sniff.. (: lol. anw, must run!

ooh i love it when bday presents are money! (: (but i need a wallet! HINT.)

spiritual HIGH(:

2006-11-05T03:45:00.000+02:00

helloo! have been so busy this week(: and also when i was free, i didn't really feel like updating. just had no desire to come on the computer. So, unlike most people, i am not sick of the computer yet, since the last time i touched it was...when i last updated!(: haha. yay me.
oh oh delayed, but i must tell you about 10k or i never ever will!(: haha. I COMPLETED 1OKM LAST SUNDAY!!(: admitted, i didnt run all the way, but i didn't intend to! i just wanted to finish it. and for once, it was me pulling sasha along and not her pulling me along(: YAY. haha. cos she was sick and i trained more(: (no offense martini). sadly i didn't get to sprint my last part cos as soon as i started runnning faster, there was like a sharp pain in my chest area..so i was panicking!! i was telling God, like why why why did it (irregular heartbeat) have to start now?! and can i just finish this first? but i was still trying to run faster.. haha. but yes i didn't die. (: YAY.
haha okay.. this week. umm..mondaytuesdaywednesday was peer leader training.. yeah it was very fun! we played alot of games.. and we learnt like alot about peer leading and yeah it is not as easy as i thought it was. i mean you've got to plan everything out and at the same time you're quite nervous and you have to know how to deal with different people in your group and stuff like that. but everybody was very nice and we had fun.. oh and the NICEST t-shirt design won(: haha. technically i didn't really help in the designing of it. but i gave opinions! (: but we still don't know what colour its going to be.. oh well.
thursday..went with lailing, elaine, julliana and jiajun to the t-shirt printer. actually i don't know why i wanted to go along.. i'm very extra(: but yeah in the end im not even sure if we are going to use that IRRITATING printer. far east..can't rmb the name of the shop..the one alot of sc girls use.. bah its on the tip of my tongue... FORGET IT. anyway, yeah cos the t-shirt colours weren't very nice and elaine said the gym tee printer was better so...YEAH. bottomline:we may be changing printer.
Then i went with sasha to white sands popular to go buy books. they didn't have all but we bought what we could. the textbooks are so THICK. ugh. im glad im not taking trip! oh yeah i decided not to appeal cos of alot of factors.. yeah. then we went for lunch and then we walked around! went to see sports shoes but white sands doesnt really have alot. im going again today to many shops and find the PERFECT SPORTS SHOE(: probably nike. SWOOSH.
we also went to the library and borrowed books for us to read when we are incredibly bored. thank goodness i've only finished two! im not THAT bored(: oh yes then i decided t go t sashas lovely big house! while waiting for her dad t pick us up,(we can't take bus home with tt large amt of books!) we decided t go buy bubble tea, so there we were, rushing so as not t keep him waiting, when this survey guy steps in front of us. I, knowing the appropriate times to be not-so-polite, say "no sorry" and step past. Sasha, however, being oh-so-innocent says "im sorry" and STOPS. she STOPS. so here begins the greatest debate. "just a few minutes", "im sorry, no", "it wont take long" "im in a hurry"..etc. and the INFURIATING guy is SO IRRITATING. when she stepped right, he blocked her, left, block, back, block. FINALLY she escaped. and i rolled my eyes OBVIOUSLY at his laughing colleagues. LOSERS.
yes after buying bubble tea we rush past those survey pple and back to the pick-up point where her dad just pulls in. HALLELUJAH! (how do you spell "hallelujah"? looks weird.) then we go t her house, watch movies, and i go home and do nothing.
i shall not continue on friday cos friday was boring and also im beginning to sound like some electronic journal. huh. anyway, if you've come this far, congratulations. actually, if you can still bother to read my blog, CONGRATULATIONS. cos if it wasnt my blog, i wouldn't bother.(:
haha.
GOD BLESS YOU.

i'm back to the winning side,
nothing can stop me now
i've got the faith and the courage
i'll stand up for you.
down satan. DOWN.

i'm on a spiritual high(:

2006-10-21T10:55:00.000+02:00

HAPPY DEEPAVALI!
technically i don't celebrate it since i'm TOTALLY a christian but still, it sounds cool(: lol.
i'm at esther's house now(: and i just logged in while she was here!! haha see how much i trust her?? esther don't betray my trust(: wahahaha!! she just recieved a second confirmation letter which is really weird since we got confirmed together AGES ago. hmmm..i have hijacked her comp. which is actually funner than i thought. haha. and i just spoke to her NICE friend Lina who has a NICE voice(: haha. she sounds like someone else i know but i'm not sure who..haha.
went to my great-aunt's house for breakfast-we go every deepavali. it was really lovely as usual, but maybe not next year since the maid is leaving and the new maid probably wont know how to help her. so i couldn't go train with the others. i'm going to die. 10k is next sunday and i've only trained once!! ahh im going to take like 2 hours to finish the thing!! i am tempted to swear): bah.
esther's comp is nicer than mine(:
cant wait to get to india. well..actually im not that excited i dont know why. except about seeing my best friend, safia. usually im pretty excited about the church work as well but this time im dreading most of it. i partly know why, but how about the OTHER churches? i have no reason to dread that. ahh sigh.
PSI better now. not as hazy today. it figures. the only day the haze comes down enough to make it suitable for jogging, i am going to CHURCH. not that i dont want to go- i REALLY do, didnt go last week. But i NEED to train. urgh.
oh well then. i shall go now.. let esther use the comp. she's just come back from MAKING HER BED(: haha.
PSI: 60 (yay!)

2006-10-15T04:43:00.000+02:00

i felt like saying something, but now that i'm here, i've got nothing to say.
hmm..
i don't exactly know how i feel, or i'd tell you.
err. i just found out that my mom has been following this Korean drama series that Shea and Rae watch in the car. Or well, at least my mom thinks its Korean dubbed in Mandarin. i personally have no idea. And have no need to cos subtitles are enough! haha. it's quite nice actually. we were watching it last night cos i didnt go to church. my dad wasnt well so i had to help around the house.
he's feeling better now. He's been sleeping alot. On normal days he usually sleeps about 5 hours. i keep telling him thats why he's sick. also, he keeps fetching people here and there and doing things for people so he's overworking himself. i mean, he's almost ..er.. he's not that young(: haha. yes.
this means i probably wont be able to go to danne's church next week cos i need to go to mine!! haha. yes. sorry.
i wonder if i can listen to the sermon online. oh wait, i know i can, but do i have the time to? oh well, i should. i have nothing to do anyway. except train for 10km, which is not coming along nicely. (: haha.
yes, anyway, i should go now. go do SOMETHING. when i can think of something to do, that is. I wanna play BRIDGE!! ahaha. but have no one to play with): and no cards. bah.. i shall wait for tomorrow and play with van and jia hui and jun yan and whoever else!! (: yay!
haha. yes. goodbye(:

2006-10-08T04:06:00.000+02:00

ahh..finally..i am BACK!!(: and best of all.. EXAMS ARE OVER!!! this means that i am free!! to slack and am not in urgent need of Sharon's reliable Stress Reduction Kit!! hahaha. yes, well sorry i havent updated since 100 years ago..(: i didnt want t go online during exams (which is so disciplined of me), and then wed i was lazy, thurs i was out, friday i was SICK): , yesterday i was out and today i am HERE. haha.
Exams were.. well.. exams. yup. results on tuesday.. and wednesday. not looking forward to it cos i don't think i'd have done very well...yet there's some hope that it will be okay. but i don't know. so i'd rather not think about it.
man. i've missed typing. missed the keys of the keyboard..(: haha. which is why i keep making mistakes!! ahaha. i'm sick. i've got a lousy HAZE-RELATED FLU thing. i hate the haze man. but it's like i'm in India! and carmen agrees(: i was telling the crazy Martini that i've got "modes". like if im in Singapore then i'll expect the air to be really clean and nice and everything, so when its hazy or dirty, then i'll be very uncomfortable and SICK. but in India, i expect the air to be dirty and irritating to the nose, eyes, etc.. So even though its worse than this, i'll still be like, oh its okay, what and i wont get SICK. So yes, i am a very interesting person!(:
okay you know, for someone who hasnt posted in this long, i have surprisingly little to say.. hmmm. i guess there's too much so i cant say all the details, and if i cant then its not interesting so i might as well not say it, and if i dont say it then i have very little left to say!! haha. Good luck in understanding that although it makes perfect sense(:
maybe i'll post again soon. or maybe i wont post until NEXT YEAR. ahaha. BYE BYE now(:

PSI: 45 thank GOODNESS!

I love MISSION TRIPS and i cannot lie.

2006-09-11T15:21:00.000+03:00

HELLO(: im back from my mission trip!! so exciting you know.. it was SOO fun!! i think everyone should go on mission trips! they ROCK(: hahah. but yeah it was really cool.. we built a house. well.. at least a bedroom, toilet and kitchen for a family there.. the first day christina (my not-so-blur roommate) and i carried the soil and levelled a bit but mostly we watered the bricks(: so they wouldnt be so brittle and they wouldnt break so easily. then the second and third day we did more work-we levelled out the soil and shovelled like mad(: we had war cries!! when we pick up the soil we went HUH then putting down was HAH!! but it took too much energy so we gave up(: the heat was pretty unbearable lah.
lucky for us we had an expert masseuse as our other roommate!! serene. (my blur roommate) but she's a good masseuse. she'll find the "bubbles" and then massage them out so we feel relaxed..(: but she's also the 'EVIL' one who wouldnt let us sleep. she even has a technique- wait for us to be almost asleep and then she'll talk to us. finally christina and i just ignored her and went to sleep!! she's also the one who woke us up "late" on the first day-only we discovered that it was an hour early cos she didnt ADJUST HER WATCH. so classic yeah? (: oh well..at least her prayers helped keep us well when we were working at the work site and she was TEDIOUSLY cutting the watermelons(:
the churches we went to were also really nice. The people were so hospitable and cooked for us and talked to us in the little english they could speak. they were also so sweet! they prayed for us and told us how touched they were that we came.. i met this girl called ester, she's 18 and she's really nice. she started chatting to me in simple english-her english was already like REALLY good-about the indian movie stars and was so thrilled when she found out i could speak Hindi(: they love Bollywood over there! Then the next time i met her she grabbed me by the hand and just started praying for me so quickly and i couldn't understand anything so i was just like, 'yes, Lord' and 'Amen' occasionally here and there!! then after that before i left she hugged me goodbye and told me not to forget her!(: she was really nice lah.
and it was so nice of the two church girls, they cooked our every meal except the last day when we went out to shop(: i think they must be really tired after that. im so touched by their gratefulness to us. they call us "team singapore"! yeah! we are TEAM SINGAPORE(: lol.
too bad we didnt succeed in matchmaking Ben(:
oh well yeah. im getting tired of typing. cant put every single exciting detail here, can i? (: hahah. sigh. see ya then. shall go do something else now!
GO ON A MISSION TRIP ONE DAY(:

2006-09-03T07:37:00.000+03:00

im not going to change the skin now cos i only have like 10 min? yeah so i might as well post or i will NEVER i mean NEVER get around to doing it!
haha.
yesterday was a really FUN day cos it was YES2! haha yea. we all were being quite mad (as usual). before service we were standing outside and colouring the hospitality tables(: which had paper and crayons for us to do so! someone wrote "paul twohill you are rock" so rachel wrote in bigger writing below it "but God is ROCK better" hahah. that was more or less when everything started becoming MADDER(: and then someone else wrote "God is better than twohill" so that was good. (: We made our point. i took a picture of it but cant get it in here cos i dunno where the cable for my hp is. yup.
and then service was good, we heard tetimonies from 4 people and a very (stupid) skit which was funny(: then many people went up for altar call!! yay(:
Sharon FORGOT again. about dinner(: but since there weren't many of us anyway, we let her go with her husband (again) and we did not do anything to make her feel GUILTY.(: although i think she did cos i wont be here next week so i cant meet them for dinner(: haha oh well. she's very funny! :D and she prayed for me cos im going on the mission trip. and she was being mad yesterday too! 'scolding' with her mouth full and gesturing with full plates(: haha. esther says it must be what married life does to you(: ahaha.
oh and we had a fun time trying to avoid the camera which kept turning on us SOMEHOW. i think its cos Sharon is with communications and so all the camera people know her and therefore WE must bear it for her sake. tsk. anyway, that is probably totally untrue but oh well.
dinner was fun! because dinner is the usual time when we all go HIGH. although we werent REALLY high yesterday. i think last week was WORSE.(: heh. We realised all of us at the table were from girls schools and we started talking about teachers, life in girls schools and the lessons, how we bully teachers, etc.. a very enriching time. and i have learnt 3 methods of cheating.(: which i do not exactly intend to use(: YET. hahah. jk.
anw..my time is up got t go fetch my mom from church(: see ya!(:

2006-08-28T15:44:00.000+03:00

ello PEOPLE(: i need to change my skin!! any recommendations?? i've asked rachel..but you know. her taste is seriously different from mine. oh and she's got a NEW NAME: the helicopter! ahaha. she looks really cute and funny doing the ACES day dance!! not that i look okay, but oh well, i can see her better than i can see myself! ahaha!
Lai Ling has a new nickname too!: lailing the LICKER. she LICKED me today i home ec!! ): she was invading my lovely clean territory and i was standing there, minding my own business when she starts laughing and turns around just in time to LICK me!!! ewww..i washed my arm..shoulda used more SOAP. darn(:
haha.yeah. today was really mad actually.between aces day stuff and gay guys (GGs) and helicopters and LICKERS.
i have an exciting school life!
this harpist came to school she played really well. Gek almost fell asleep so that proves she's good cos a good harpist must make people laugh, cry and sleep!! haha. then natY and i were trying to figure out what type of harp esther plays..still clueless. (: must ask her on sat..if i dont forget! (as usual)
oh well then. thats about it. regular posts mean SHORTER ones! yay!
:D

2006-08-27T06:35:00.000+03:00

hello people(: thanks to tammie im listening to the walk to remember soundtrack now..haha(: she's so OBSESSED with it! hahah.no la (kidding tams!) it's a really sweet story..i would have cried if RACHEL ONG hadn't been sitting beside me going "heeheehee" every 5 seconds(: oh well..thats what you get for being friends with a eggplant/chipmunk/sirROT/duck/white ghost/CRAZY girl. yes, indeed. it IS my fault.
:D
went for commisioning prayer at 4 pm service yesterday(for my mission trip) and then my team members were like sitting in the SECOND row so after the prayer i had to rush off for cell(which i was already late for) and then the WHOLE SANCTUARY was like staring at me so i just put this fake smile on my face and ran out!! SO embarassing. sigh. now i sound like MAY. its all her fault im becoming so SELF-CONSCIOUS. oh well.
sarah got robbed. on thursday at 7.45 pm by some foreign Indian guy. And she KICKED him. GO SARAH!! but she still lost her phone. poor girl. hence Carmen has declared that we all must be home by then(: oops, i mean SHORTY. :D
saturday was a rather eventful day actually..before now it just seemed rather normal..OH and i saw Enemy with his cell yesterday.. they were occupying the room WE booked so we got to chase them out!! hahah.. but his cell leader is nice. she used to teach me in sunday sch i think.( for abt 2 weeks when i was living in india and came back for holiday..)
ah well..thats all folks!(: haha yeah. oh you should read NEIL GAIMAN'S book-NEVERWHERE. its really really good! yup. and as Mr. Vandemar would say: BUH-BYE!
(:

loooooong time no POST

2006-08-23T15:59:00.000+03:00

wahh..today was FRENCH test.. okay i was sort of prepared for it AND it wasnt as hard as i expected, but i bet i still screwed it up anyway(: ah well.
oh today was also the salad thingy. I think every class' salad was nice! haha. our rojak(roar-jak) was NICE. haha. i liked it anyway. Not bad for mostly first-timers..(:
oh i shall put the squid society pledge here:

We the squids of 2co,
pledge to save THE sotong,
regardless of size, darkness of ink,
number of tentacles and skin colour,
to build a squiddish society,
based on science and technology,
so as to achieve a balance of atoms,
and progress for our class.

haha i guess im a bit delayed since we came up with this AGES ago, but oh well. i havent posted since then(:
bah. i dunno what to say. this doesnt happen often..
BAM. now i know what to say!! i signed up for 10km run,(or in my case, WALK) today. I'm going to die. seriously. i only agreed finally cos tammie's doing it with me ans sasha promised to stay with me and not get frustrated that im going so slow..(although i dont really expect her to) i mean i know she WILL, but i dont think i want to deprive her of the glory of going FAST(: heh.
oh well..till i post again. which may be next year at the rate I'M going.(: haha.

2006-08-16T15:07:00.000+03:00

i hav increased the size. hopefully everyone can see better[okay, i wanted to. But it just looked weird..](: PLANETSHAKERS rocked although i injured my leg jumping(: sasha and rachel gave a detail-lacking description of what REALLY happened.
here's the TRUTH, : i sat down after jumping like mad, and so my blood circulation was bad. I mean, it has to flow through the whole LONG leg!! then i stood up, and my leg was ASLEEP. (numb) but, we started jumping again, and OF COURSE i wanted to jump too! So i jumped. when my leg was numb and i couldn't feel it at all. And, unknown to me, i was landing on the tip of my toes and not properly, so the strain all went to my calf instead of my foot. HENCE, i ended up with severe muscle strain. And if ONE MORE PERSON laughs at me IN MY FACE i will HIT YOU.(: just so you know..
anyway, there's something wrong with my comp. I sent rachelO the pics on SUNDAY, and she didnt get them. and my friend didnt recieve the card i sent her. oh well, i sent the pics again, she BETTER get it.
OH. i am a member of the Squid Society. Gek lynn and Lailing are the chairsquids, natY and i are the vice-chairsquids, and there are members called..um..i forgot. but it was very cute!! i will scan the logo in here asap! but it may already be on gek's blog..(:
ohoh! there's this cute poem my mom taught me that reminded me of Gek, the llama.

The one 'l' llama, he is a priest.
The two 'l' llama, he is a beast
And i bet my silk pajama,
There is no such thing as
A three 'l' lllama!

haha so cute, yes? oh well, then.. i shall go SOMEWHERE(:
:)

2006-08-10T12:33:00.000+03:00

helloo(: went for the Day Of His Power on tuesday night. So AWESOME(: haha yeah. we prayed alot and worshipped alot and even screamed alot (for God) so my throat ended up feeling hoarse and dry): but it was worth it, God is ALWAYS worth it. YEAH!(: haha. Me, tammie, rachel ong, abby(heng), and danitza went with sasha and her church but we sat one row in front of them. andrea (sasha's church,shps) sat next to Kevin (frm church, staff, india mission trip 02) and complained that he sang so loudly her ears hurt! HAHAH. so typical of him.
Pastor Jennifer was leading worship along with other people from other churches, Pastor Derek led us in communion and Natassia(i hope thats how you spell it) did the Declaration at the end. So cool yeah?
We all were (as tammie puts it) uber cold! haha. cos we were sitting right in front of the air-con! So when we were praying we joined "hands" at the elbows and huddled so we felt warmer. and coincidentally, both charis and danne returned my punjabi suits, so we used the scarves to keep us warm! but we were still cold. bah(: and then at the end we all were worshipping with our hands straight up in the air, so my hands started freezing! but who cared?! i was worshipping GOD after all! haha(:
i never did find my cell. hmmm.. wonder where they were sitting. Carmen said...4th row from the back? or was it the front? oh well..
slept over at sasha's house. watched She's the man. AND ate mac and cheese made by eugenia and sasha. AND wished each other Happy National Day and 12am. following the BBC countdown.(hourly). can't believe channel 5 didnt do a countdown t National Day. they were showing some weird movie. we did stupid stuff(: FUN stupid stuff. I have a picture of sasha as SUSHI? and eugenia as a JAM TART(: which looks wrong. (for other reasons) oh, and charis the SUN GOD. who feel asleep one hour earlier than the rest of us.
I LOVE CHARIS' PHONE. as soon as i win the lottery, i'll get it.which is NEVER. bah. sigh. its the Nokia 6280. i like it better than the 3250. but its an impossible DREAM. cos i'll never be allowed t get contract, and without contract it costs like $500 plus!! where do i get that kind of money??? oh, how i WISH money grew on TREES.
didnt do much wed. day flew past with eating, leaving sashas house, sleeping, watching ndp on tv, etc.
today i went t town w my dad. he went t give blood. 98 donations already!! that means the minimum possible amount of years he's been donating for is 24!! whoa. cos you're only allowed 4 times a year!! so COOL. anw, then we went t eat and i ate laksa which i only ate once before, in p5 in the shps canteen!! lol. then we went t see the price of charis' phone!! ): then to the car showroom, cos i'm GETTING A CAR!! haha finally. its a hyundai Verna. we bidded today, and we GOT IT. just dunno what colour we'll get. oh well. praise the LORD!!
sigh oh well, thats all. admire you're perseverance in reading this far!! haha
sch tmr):

2006-08-06T15:29:00.000+03:00

hello(: i think this song is really nice!! i just discovered it yesterday- i dont know who its by and its not on radioblogclub so you shall just have to be content with my singing(:

Absence makes the heart grow fonder
You lift me when I fall,
I hold on to all,
I can,
It's all I can do,
To stop falling in love with you.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder
I continue
I'm waiting for you,
What are you trying to do?
Absence makes the heart grow fonder
but all this time i'm waiting isn't good
What are you trying to do?

You pick me when i'm down
no matter how cliche it sounds
it's the truth
i'm falling in love with you

Absence makes the heart grow fonder
I continue
I'm waiting for you,
What are you trying to do? (to me)
I know Absence makes the heart grow fonder
but all this time i'm waiting isn't good
What are you trying to do?

Bridge
You're so far away, nobody understands
this bond we share across the lands.
I know it seems hard to feel this way forever,
but through all of it,
i'm still falling in love with you.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder
I continue
I'm waiting for you,
What are you trying to do?
Absence makes the heart grow fonder
but all this time i'm waiting isn't good
What are you trying to do?

you. its all your fault. you got me into this and you can't be bothered to get me out. i hate you. just get lost 'cos you're not helping and seeing you just makes me wanna kill myself.

2006-08-05T07:49:00.000+03:00

BOO!! (: i haven't posted/blogged for so long.. AND yes, thanks to you lovely people who tag my tagboard cos at least then there are SOME changes on my blog compared t the last time i posted AGES ago! haha
well, 3rd august didn't happen! NOW everyone sees why i'm so high and happy! (not really, but..) i'm really glad that it didn't take place cos i mean how many people would have died and all. We can only pray that something like that will NEVER happen. (although i know it will. It's written in PLAIN ENGLISH in the bible, confirmed, no date given.)
sch has been okay, except for my newly discovered HATE OF SCIENCE, of which i of course would have t have a test on monday. AND my depression at my science grades. ):
i NEED TUITION!! who would have thought i would have ever said that? anyway. after 14 years of living-I have decided that i shall swallow my pride at my (non-existent) smartness, and ADMIT i need tuition): oh sigh.
WELL.i shall remain happy :D
oh well..have t go now..going out for lunch, then CELL, then CHURCH. Yippee! (:
tata!

can't wait for Tuesday. SASHA! i want my favourite bed and blanket(: lol.

little things like these make me happy.

you. dont know me like you thought you did

2006-07-27T16:14:00.000+03:00

I've built this wall around myself
i've distanced me from the crowd
I pushed away all the friends i could have
just for you.

I lied these lies to protect you
and now you say it was a mistake
I've become a loner
to get back on my feet i don't know what it'll take

you say you haven't lied,
its just elimination of the truth
its all the same to me
you know how much i love you

don't you care?

i guess i was wrong.

emotion can be decieving.

2006-07-27T14:17:00.000+03:00

haahaha. feeling happier today. despite French test and stressful e-learning although our class had rather little homework. well, excluding Chinese!

But! I had to study for French petit test! which in the end wasnt so bad although i think i pretty much screwed it up. Cos of the structure and stuff like that. sigh):

Im not sure if i want more e-learning days. I suppose i do, but in the long-run, my eyes will HURT after too long on the comp, and my degree will go higher until it's like SASHA'S!! (haha no offense dear) just saying.

i'm happy cos now the rest of my weekend is considerably free-er. English can't really be studied for unless you wanna read the dictionary(:

hahahaa.yeah. feel in better spirits today. well, tah tah cos i have nothing else t say!!

except: To the man who pleases him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness,
but to the sinner he gives the task of gathering and storing up wealth
to hand it over to the one who pleases God.
This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.
Ecclesiastes 2:26

2006-07-26T15:44:00.000+03:00

hello all(: I finished the Bible code book today. I wonder if it's going to come true. All the "older, (supposedly) wiser" people have already dismissed it as crap, and 'they've been saying that for so long!'Its the end of the world im talking about.
The secret code (part fact, part fiction) says that on Av 9, 5766 on the Jewish calendar, (Aug 3, 2006) an atomic bomb will be dropped on Jerusalem. Thats the code-in-tje-Bible part. Then it talks about country leaders plotting t put the bomb there. And Iraq was one of the countries, and China, who had a grudge against the USA cos of the past and cos USA was supporting Israel. So far, the Israel vs Iraq part is confirmed fact. Who knows what else might be true? I mean the book was written in 1998!
But then, it could just be coincidence. Only 3 words are confirmed. Israel vs Iraq.
ahh..
i'm quite confused about it. Wondering whether to listen to the "elders" or be naive? Is it being naive? hmm..
In bible study we've been talking about the end of the world. The rapture and how MY BRACES WOULD BE LEFT BEHIND(: and more serious stuff. Today we also talked about heaven.. rachel imagines white fluffy clouds t bounce on, and i think Danitza said something about "marshmallow" and "sun"? I'm afraid t connect it(: (: haha
There's lots we cant understand, yeah? Its frustrating sometimes, so i MUST remember t pray and ask for wisdom and understanding from God. But i'm growing in Him, closer to Him, and that's a great help. I'm learning to turn to Him for little things like Humans Quiz and Chinese Talentime. He's honoured my requests more than twice.
I'm thankful.
And i know He's there for me always. I can feel Him with me whenever. Its something i've come to love and i don't know what i'd do if i couldn't feel Him always by my side.
So, i thank God again and again.
Still thinking about the bombing. i guess we'll know soon. Next week. Exactly one week.
God is good.

you filthy liar.
what do you tell your friends?
nothing. everything.
all but the truth.
behind the facade
what is there?
more lies ?
or someone you're proud of?
The friends you know
you love so much
So why do you lie
and hide behind
your stupid pretense?

randomosity

2006-07-25T15:31:00.000+03:00

oohh..no post for so long yeah? And you thought i was getting better!! ahahaha! fooled ya! (unintentionally, so does it count?) hahah. okay never mind. i'm feeling totally lame now and yeah, pretty bored too. Its so sad. I almost changed my blogskin yesterday, but i had t go before i perfected it, and now i cant find where i saved it. I seriously combed the whole comp. sigh. i have t go redo the whole thing again!! ugh):
Esther's weird. that day she asked me if i asked anyone in church t link me, and then i said, no,why? and she started laughing weirdly and said never mind. and i STILL dont know why!!
we've changed place. so now i'm sitting next t perlin! haha. i can always ask her about math cos shes like so pro at it!! She got 29 for yesterdays test la!! pro-ded person! okay, that looks weird in writing.
hah. im not feeling myself tday. i feel DIFFERENT. like another person altogether!! its quite cool. I hope this other person is better at French!! hahaha
sighs. im off now to attempt t change my skin AGAIN. if its still the same, then you know what happened!

lalala!

2006-07-19T16:21:00.000+03:00

CONGRATULATIONS to the lovely 2CO performers who did so well today!! 1st!! WOW(: you guys rock, la! haha.
sigh. i need a new blogskin. But i havent found any that i really like. Im like running out of things to search for and the lists are so LONG. sigh. why cant i find nice blogskins??!! WHY?!?! sigh.
pouffe. i should be doing MATH now. or FRENCH. i'm supposed t study on mon, wed, thu. But i really cant be bothered to!! aiyah... sigh.
okay..i shall go off now..and be a good girl(:
<br>
its over. No questions asked.
what can i ask anyway?

beautiful song..

2006-07-17T13:37:00.000+03:00

My Glorious
The world's shaking with the love of God
Great and glorious, let the whole Earth sing
And all you ever do is change the old from new
People we believe that...
(Chorus)

God is bigger than the air I breathe
The world we'll leave
God will save the day and all will say
My glorious!

Clouds are breaking, heaven's come to earth
Hearts awakening let the church bells ring
And all you ever do is change the old to new
People we believe that...
(Chorus)

God is bigger than the air I breathe
The world we'll leave
God will save the day and all will say
My glorious! (9x)
My Glorious! (8x)
God is bigger than the air I breathe
The world we'll leave
God will save the day and all will say
My glorious! (20x)

i think this is such a beautiful song. Maybe i shouldn't have put the whole thing cos its kind of long, but oh well. Its really nice(: Go listen to it if you can. Somehow! (:

2006-07-16T07:28:00.000+03:00

GOD is SO AMAZING. I just can't get over it. Well, yes, i guess we aren't designed to comprehend. But STILL.
Yesterday both my cell leader and the preacher spoke on David facing Goliath. And how he OVERCAME. yes, i think that's something i need to do. And have FAITH. try not to plan out everything, but let my father in heaven do that for me.
You know that song, it goes, "pray, pray for the people on your heart...I believe that if I seek you I can touch the people on your heart." Yes, well that's what I need to do. SEEK HIM.
i think yesterday was a Defining Moment for me.
I learnt so much. and i'm excited about God!! Pastor Inban(my uncle) will be proud of me. He spoke about that in his seminar which i attended yesterday.
I think my first step right now will be to overcome all the Goliaths in my life. I can think of so many offhand. And that includes studying, so i'm off to Geog now!(:
YYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH to all you Goliaths out there. I've got the Lord almighty on my side. What use are your sword, spear and javelin?

Giants exist to fall, demons come for target practice. i am YOUR overcomer.

YYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

rantings-

2006-07-10T14:11:00.000+03:00

I had a dream last night. I dom't know if it was from the Lord, or just another silly fream that i have occassionally. In my dream, there was a um..nerdy-looking teacher standing at a blackboard-like the one in cartoons(green)-and on one side there were alot of equations, on the other, full chunks of words that looked like...whoa. And then the teacher was like, this is physics, and she pointed to the side with equations, and then she pointed to the other side and said, this is biology, and then she pointed to me and said, you, take the physics test, and i was so NERVOUS. then she pointed again and said no, biology. and i felt so relieved and happy! SO could this be a sign to take bio next year??

sighhhh. i need confirmation.

i have been slacking today cos im busy being happy that today is over- sci, lit, poetry bang. and i'm so happy cos ITALY WON! before you throw stones at me, i agree its cos of Zidane being sent off, and maybe France should have won. But WHATEVER, i still support ITALY. (:

the Lord has given me this love for you, His compassion. But the doors i'm knocking at really seem to be closed. How much truth is there in those fictitious lines? I'm praying that they'll be opened, but please, don't make me wait that long. What else can i do? I'm praying for wisdom.

Teach me the way, oh Lord.

2006-07-08T06:11:00.000+03:00

4 years...4 YEARS. time flew. yet i still miss the old days.
sigh.

yes, im drifting away. going through something difficult. I know you're with me, but i can't feel your presence.

"i will never leave you or forsake you"

there's no service today.
im dead.

2006-07-03T07:23:00.000+03:00

hahahahah!! i haven't posted for SOOOOOOOO long(: but everythings pretty much the same now as then(: school has started though and thus there is added sadness to my life, but otherwise i actually feel quite happy! i'm going to watch Les Choristes tonight and see Tammie's beloved jBM! hahaha. Tammie must feel jealous?

haha. i watched High school musical last night finally(: it was quite nice la! my cousin's wife was watching with me and she was hiding the remote cos she didn't want my THREE RESTLESS NEPHEWS to change the channel! haha. she's quite fun la(: and she's like 3o plus and she already has 4 kids(: and she works!! she's so PRO!! ahahahah!

siiiiiiggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh.. anyway, i dont really know what to say cos everything has been pretty routine since SCHOOL started): so its basically, wake up, eat, go to school, eat, end school, eat, stay back for something or the other, go home, do homework, slack for an hour or so, and then sleep(: hhahah. sigh. okay then.

pfft..

i'm really sorry
i don't know whats happening
can this really be the truth?
sorry, and sorry again

have you ever felt like your insides are burning?

SORRY. SORRY. SORRY. I'M SORRY LORD,
I'M SORRY TO ANYONE I'VE HURT
I'M SORRY TO ANYONE WHO WILL LISTEN

im back(: (sadly)

2006-06-22T09:05:00.000+03:00

hahaha! im back! yes. I AM BACK(: okay..whatever! em...i haven't been able to do much properly though. im too jet lagged! i think i gave rachel(ong) and some other people the wrong date of my return. SORRY. i was confused!): anyway..back to ME(: i have been sleeping at 5am everyday since i came back on tuesday at 9.30 am. and yesterday i woke up at 3pm which is like...8am london! so im right on schedule for the WRONG TIME ZONE. sigh. today i woke up at 11am though(: haha. im still not sure if theres test on monday, but i have read the intro to merchant and part of the book so i've only got science(if at all).

sigh. i feel like i've been away alot longer than a week. i think it's because i totally detached myself from my "singapore life". as in i forgot about all my work and stuff (but not my friends!!) so i just enjoyed myself TOTALLY. it was a real holiday(: i just realised when i came back, that on the trip i was really HAPPY. not happy, but HAPPY. authentic happiness. and you know what? i've never been happy before.

irony: on the trip i was reading a nice book. title> happy ever after

weird, isn't it?

hhhhhhaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh. that was supposed to be a long sigh(: im definitely going to return. there, i mean. My dad feels the call to Paris, so who knows? i might end up staying there. He says its a confirmation that God closed the doors to my learning Hindi and opened the door for French. Furthermore, both my parents studied French although my mother is more fluent and my dad has forgotten most of it. Makes sense, but the thing is, i didn't like Paris that much. I preferred London, but everyone i spoke to about this seems to like Paris more. Maybe it's just that London is more similar to Singapore. I know myself. I've got to know evrything about a place/thing/person? before i can enjoy it or feel comfortable there. (i don't know about the person though). i don't like err. surprises? in that sense. i don't think you understand but never mind!

i know this probably sounds dumb and just something that i'll never do anyway, i thought of like when i'm older, i could go with some friends to europe and we could like do a tour and act like Tourists! (: i thought it would be fun. But when i write it out it's...i don't know..):

another long sigh. its pretty hard to try and recount all the places i went to, so im not going to, especially not on a blog. its easier to just tell someone in person, yeah? so i will(:

okay..well yeah. i'm sleepy now..gotta go do SOMETHING to keep me awake. if you read this at about um..2.30pm and are free, CALL ME so i wont fall asleep! haha. thank you. (:

even if you don't, i still do.

sigh.

did you ever really?

and away we go!

2006-06-11T10:35:00.000+03:00

my guess is that blogger wasnt really down for maintenance but my dumb computer probably did something so i couldn't access it:( My comp's really weird. That day...YESTERDAY! Norton parental control popped up from NOWHERE (although it wasn't even installed) and blocked my access to my EMAIL ACCOUNT! cos it matched some category! ugh! sigh.
well..i didnt intend on posting for a very long time but oh well(: since im going away tonight! im leaving at 8.30, although my flight is at 11. I dunno why! sigh. it must be all my parents experiences in India when it can sometimes take FOREVER to clear customs. oh well(: it wont feel like that long. I hope(: <br> I shall enjoy my trip! OH. please pray for a safe flight for me and a good trip without any misfortunes(like being pickpocketed)! THANK YOU(: i feel excited! which is good cos up till just know i was feeling kind of sick): i guess its writing down everything...you know..getting the feeelings out of your system(:(: hahahaha...all that counsellor stuff! i guess i works though. sigh. whatever! hahahah!
okay then(: em.. yeah. buh-bye everybody! I know you'll miss me! (: i'll miss you too! haha. okay okay..BYE!(:

pride(: and other things

2006-06-02T11:18:00.000+03:00

hees(: i feel very happy. but i don't know why.. oh i know why! i finished all my homework!! except history reflections and NEWater!! yayayayay! i even read part of merchant of venice. i'm so proud of ME! hahaha(:
okay.. well..before i forget. let me say this: The trip to PARIS and LONDON was paid for by my uncle. The flight and accomodation. if not, i'll be able to go there and sit on the streets and look at everything only(: so i really really want to thank God for him and for the fact that he's been so good to us. And please pray that he'll be saved.. thank you(:
yesterday was very fun(: chi ying's farewell party! it didn't seem very "farewell-y" though! but it was fun. Alot of us (except those working on the fire and those who claimed to be) went "swimming" in the sea. and 'water- bombing' each other(: especially MAY. and jia hui who poured a whole bag of water into my t-shirt): oh well(: and a whole line of us held hands and crossed our legs and sat on the sand a little bit into the water and took great delight in getting knocked over by huge waves(: and screaming, of course!
We didn't actually manage to get the fire started though, despite help from Sandra's mum. Although we did roast marshmallows. So no chicken wings for us. ): We heard Singapore Idol results on Yiting's radio..oh and we ate CAKE(: it was a good time la..

In the end, after giving about 3 prawns, 2 sausages and a nugget(which it didn't eat) to a (FUSSY) cat, we gave most of the leftover food that we couldn't bring home to a lady and her daughter who were making LAKSA a few pits away! We were also quite shocked to learn that her (BLAZING,HUGE) fire was started with just 3 fire starters, while ours, dying and weak had used up 150 fire starters! (according to Sasha).
well, then..i guess thats it(: i have been on the comp for 5 hours doing homework, so i shall go rest my eyes now(:tata!

excitement the size of....?

2006-05-29T12:35:00.000+03:00

helloo(: this will be short! i'm actually posting cause sasha asked me to! I really don't know what to say nowadays.. sigh. Well.. i know what to say today!

I'M GOING TO LONDON AND PARIS!(:
yay me! (: i can practise French! hahaha. i hope to shop too(: but its expensive. VERY expenisve. yesyes.
Also, i got confirmed on Saturday! very cool, yes? YES! by my relative. er..my aunt's brother-in-law. He's the assistant bishop. Even cooler, yes? YES! ahahah.
okay, well. that's it. Told ya it would be short!

hello cousin:)

2006-05-24T11:56:00.000+03:00

today was a LOVELY day, that passed so quickly! i cant believe that its already 5! i woke up at 8.45, in a panic cos i was supposed to leave my house at 9.15 to meet sasha at white sands! obviously i left late, then the stupid bus chose today of all days to BREAK DOWN. so i had to wait for the next bus:( so sasha had to stand in front of 7 eleven for 13 mins waiting for ME!

then we went to shps 'funfair'. well, we only went to see ms joyce tan and any other teachers. so we walked around while waiting for her. So BORING:) she demanded to know why we were still growing and was happy to realise she was still taller than sasha by about 2cm?!? she also asked if anyone from 5/6 or 6/6 was attached! :) and demanded that when we have boyfriends we have to bring them to see her!:) i told her it'd be very long until then! she said "yah la. girls school what. No chances. when you go jc then can" haha. i wonder if she knows the number of people in girls schools who have boyfriends:D
hahahaha. then went to tm! sasha bought present for mary-ann who's leaving tmr, and i bought a nice bracelet. Went to Pastamania AGAIN for lunch:) but okay la.
went for haircut with sasha! i layered my hair again but not much difference in the length. cos i like long hair:) always have. sasha washed her hair and straightened it temporarily:) i think she looks like 'cousin it' from the adams family:) but she looks quite nice la. she was so shocked cos it cost her $22!! the lady didn't warn her so it was quite unfair:(
then came to my house to eat LAYS-SOUR CREAM AND ONION. thats the 3rd time in 3 days that i'm eating them. i must have put on weight!!! AHHHH. im going jogging tonight. hopefully i can lose some weight in the holidays. :D
i like boring pple about my day:) i hope that you have all found it very entertaining and that you will come back and read my blog again:) as you probably can tell, i feel very happy now:) ta-ta!

random?

2006-05-21T05:24:00.000+03:00

okay, hi! :) firstly, you know what, i have given up on the idea of writing a serious post cuase the mood's just gone now, and you can't force yourself to feel serious. So, when i next feel like it, i shall write a serious post. that could be anytime. but i think i will post more in the holidays. except when i'm overseas of course:)
lalalala. my comp is seriously hanging:( sigh. old computers pretty much suck. i've got violin class soon. i don't really like it. i want to quit actually, but my parents want me to continue. WHY? sigh. i just don't have the PERSEVERANCE and the DISCIPLINE to excel in something like that. ughy. oh well...
open house was tiring yesterday.. i stayed at the stall in the HEAT for so long by MYSELF when the others were selling or had CCAs :( i'm actually visibly darker. you know, that really sucks cos i really didn't want to be any darker than i already was. oh well, thats just being vain:)
okayy..i dunno what else to say. i repeat: I AM NOT SUITED TO BLOGGING. though it can be quite fun to have a blog:) except when your comp hangs and you're trying to type!! oh well, thats it for awhile..

shortnsweet:)

2006-05-14T16:16:00.000+03:00

aahrgh. Math Test tomorrow! DIE!!!!!.. okok. promise i will post properly as soon as i have the time, and maybe finally get down to that SERIOUS post that i wanted to do:) haha:)
lol XD

but you threw it all away
all i ever had
all i ever needed
you held it in your hand
but you threw it all away
on that fateful day
when i came to say
i love you.

LONG-AWAITED POST!

2006-05-10T15:51:00.000+03:00

for those of you who are dying to hear more of my WORDS OF WISDOM, i am back:) ahahah. after not posting for forever! i am very very sorry. :) haha. i honestly wanted to write a serious post, but then i thought of that LOVELY opening sentence, and i couldn't resist:) hahah. my next post will be a SERIOUS one:)
my friend the mad evil genius has not talked to me for so long:) and i insist that if she reads this she must write a letter to reply the one i wrote to her last year!! hahah. bad genius:) i feel very happy today:) i went shopping with my mom again and bought many many LOVELY things. hahah. like a new wallet thingy and um... other things:) also, my dad came back from india today:) he wasn't away THAT long, but i'm very close to him, so i miss him:) hehs. I had a good time with my mother while he was away though:)
lol. okay i shall go now:) byebye. :D drifting aloof in this maze of feelings you just somehow understand but you're just the angel that God has sent me to take me through to the promised land. --

catching up:)

2006-04-27T16:04:00.000+03:00

hehs. havent blogged in a WEEK:) oh well. told somebody that day that i wasn't suited to blogging, but oh well:) hah. i shall update EVERYBODY on the goings-on of my life for the past week:) no lah. since tues:)) ermm.. tuesday was..?? indescribable? hah.no. um. . . OH YES! ms lau PRAISED MY WORKING:)) well, technically. she was marking it then she went, "good, expand out first" or something like that:) i was very happy i tell you:D and i LOVE smileys so much! i feel they are very good in expressing my happy feelings:) haha.
after that the next memorable thing was french. it was very slack. we learnt how to write resumes. [ray-sume-ays]. no accent so you cant see that its not the weird plural of "resume" :) then the most weird thing happened:) i was going home in the 53, and then there was this really dumb show on tv mobile, and then halfway through the bus ride, i realised that i was feigning interest in the dumb programme!! i tell you, its the result of too many boring lessons with teachers that insist you pay attention!! (e.g.FRENCH) hah.
then came wednesday. it started off well. sasha and i saw gurmit singh in the car parallel to ours driving his daughter into sc:) we had the idea of ambushing him and asking for his autograph/interview for CE project or his daughter would GO IN LATE TO SCHOOL. ahahaha. but we decided that we had best do it another day when my whole CE group was there!! haha. just kidding of course. (in case i get sued for plotting an assasination or whatever). :D oh then was the Silly emergency exercise so HOT. and during CHINESE some more. so i lost my FREE PERIOD. lucky i had not depended on it to do any homework:) we didnt exactly do anything. the guides were supposed to make sure the primary school pple were 'squatting', but we didnt get anywhere. we only got LOTS of QUESTIONS:) like "why was may wearing a jacket?" i wonder why myself:) and we saw nat ng's sister:) she asked us whether we knew natalie from 2sy:) and we DID:) hahah nat.
then during rap we told GHOST STORIES. we wanted to turn off the lights and turn on the fan full blast, but the closest we got was turning off the ligths at the back of the class:) cos some pple were scared:) then mrs lee came in and we begged her to tell us some but she didn't want to in case we got scared (since they happened in school) so she only told some very UN-SCARY ones. :( but she said that when we are in sec 4 we can go look for her and she'll tell us. I SHALL REMEMBER THAT. it was just the right mood since it was raining. and DARK. there were a few REALLY scary ones. but i think there was one permenantly etched in ALL our heads. i shall not put it here of course. but if you want to HEAR IT, come look for me or geklynn:) hahah. oh well.
that brings me to today. okay. considering 4 bad things were already in my head when i came to school, i'd say that today wasn't bad. 1. 2.4km run. 2.science practical. 3.french 4.braces tightening:( how good can you feel when you have these four staring you in the face? 2.4 was quite-bleagh-in the end, but i'm just glad its over. i will definitely do better next year, i will practice hard and get an A! YEAH! sci prac was okayy. but i think i screwed up the second page. i think the WORD EQUATIONS were so completely EASY. they were the best part of the paper! DEFINITELY. french was okay too, cos i finshed my homework in time!! many thanks to the LOVELY GEKLYNN(sheepy) who lent me her WHOLE PENCIL CASE OF MARKERS to bring to french! i cant believe it! i'm so lucky to have such NICE friends:) hahah. thanks gek! and everybody:) for being NICE. hah, im getting sentimental. ohmygosh. this was SERIOUSLY a long post.but i admire if you had the patience to read until here:) and everyone, just pray for me for a certain situation that i am facing that i can't put here. thank youuu:)********************************************************** look what you did to me. see the state i'm in. i can't help it and you're not helping me either.

2006-04-22T03:44:00.000+03:00

yesterday was uhm..fairly normal.. routine day.. and i shall bore you by telling you about it! hah. well.. i'm lost in balancing equations, cos i can't get what she's talking about at all. well, maybe just a bit:) and i dont want to study for geog!! i dont want to take tests! i want to sleep!!:) ohh..and we didn't present our music in the end, but i think that ours is very nice already:) just our music that we have to work on more. and we can't keep deleting it when it really sounds fine!! (hint:rachel!!) :D anyway, after school was GUIDES, the torture. okayy...the first half was pretty okay. we were painting the banner and writing on people's t-shirts with chalk:) all sorts of nonsense. so that's probably the most fun we'll ever have:( it was better than the last time i went for guides which was ages ago-cos of OM. However, the next half, we did horseshoe formation. which sucks:( we had to march, although i didn't properly:) hahah. then i went for CELL . which was good, cos i really felt the Lord in control over some of the stuff i was worrying about then, and i think that really made my day good. And i can't wait to go to church today!!:):) so..that's it- my boring day:) [except for the last part]. God will make a way when there seems to be no way He works in ways we cannot see He will make a way for me He will be my guide hold me closely to His side with love and strength for each new day He will make a way He will make a way By a roadway in the wilderness He'll lead me' and rivers in the desert will I see heaven and earth will fade but His word will still remain He will do something new today

ughy.

2006-04-20T12:27:00.000+03:00

today was NAPFA!! i am so irritated about my inclined pull-ups!! i could've done better!! i SHOULD'VE done better!! but i didn't!! gah. sigh. the rest were okay. 3 As and a B. i'm very pleased with my standing broad jump too cos i did better than i've ever done before:) 1.68m!! yay me!:) haha. anyway..I LOVE playing angel and ward! it's so fun! except, my angel hasn't written anything to me yet!! hurry up angel! i'm getting impatient!!:) oh, and after napfa we went to WAFFLETOWN!! so fun, yes? YES! me, lailing, ying, nat y, tamtam, jia hui, willa, amanda, chi ying, sarahk, and sasha!! very very fun!! very very FULL. :) hahahahah. oh well, 5 items are over, and theres enough time to train for 2.4 next thurs without having to worry about eating ALOT today. i hope! yesyes. um..oh esther(yong, NOT ong) and i are going out on saturday if possible!! so exciting! In all my 10 years of knowing her, we have not gone out once!!! except to wild wild wet with my nephews like a year ago? and that doesn't count:) uhm..yes theres nothing much to say really.. today was a pretty good day! i just wish that tomorrow was saturday:) ohyes, must go study GEOG. so sad:( well..yes..byebye! i feel too high to continue with writing anything SANE:)

the load coming off

2006-04-18T13:36:00.000+03:00

hellooo!!! it really is a small world after all...today i was going home with Ting Ting (from co) and i found out that she is from the same primary school as Nat yeo and my church friend esther who also coincidentally knows Roxanne, who knows Sasha who knows ME! :)) haha. also that day (like sasha) i clicked on a link on somebody's blog which i can't remember, which brought me to my church friend's blog, then to my close friend in primary school, then ANOTHER friend in church before i was linked back to LAILING. so weird!! really small world after all. :D haha..today was a pretty average day. Ran in malcolm park during pe. Mrs De said that if our legs didn't feel like jelly after running then we aren't human. However, i don't think anyone's legs felt like jelly, cos mine didn't, nat's didn't and neither did willa's. Thus, it is mrs de who is not human!! :) the rest of the day was okay until FRENCH. i was sitting next to jun yan, talking too much as usual and suddenly my teacher decides to pick on me, and sends me to sit in the FIRST ROW with a BABOON!!! i was so irritated. ugh. i refuse to go for french tmr!! ha. i cant anw, i have stuff to do.. :) oh..and i forgot to mention-whoever wants spider, best brand tonic from gs lab can ask perveen and eleanor:)) haha:) ingredients: dead spider, sodium hydroxide, hydrochloric acid.. um..thats it i think:) sigh. long day today.. just wanna say about saturday: i'm terribly sorry about what happened, please stop holding this grudge against me. And i think that although what happened was horrible and nobody enjoyed it at all, in the end it was all God's will and i will accept it no matter how i really feel, cos God allowed it to happen for a purpose i will never understand, and i'm okay with that.

?

2006-04-16T04:41:00.000+03:00

i am feeling terrible today.its cos of um..yesterday. I think its totally my fault that we did worse than we should have and i feel so terrible. i mean just one STUPID mistake and thats it. ugh. but i want to do it next year again. i think my whole group wants to. then we'll do better!! the idea makes me happier to some extent:) yes, i know my blogskin is pretty... ahem, but i have no time to do something about it, and i dunno what i should do anyway, im pretty bad at this stuff. I cant believe i just missed church this morning cos i overslept. i feel terrible:( i had to apologise to God. And get the sermon tape. I think it's a good sermon, my father's preaching:) :) ha. i dont think i'm suited to blogging:) cos i never have time to go online.. sigh. i really need assurance from God about certain things, so please pray for me all of you out there:) i haven't started studying Lit, but science is okay.. i think it's so horrible to have tests when Some People were busier than OTHERS. :)) oh well.. sigh.

slowly.

2006-04-12T13:39:00.000+03:00

hello..today was a fairly okay day..but i am really irritated at SOMEONE for ignoring me, along with some people who have no idea how to show friendliness. Am i that insignificant? And i now have to do chapter 7 of my maths assesment book because miss lau insists that i do..and show her!! i'm sure its good for me and whatever, but theres so little time nowadays, and i still have to study for the tests next week, where I MUST DO WELL. doesn't she think of that? sigh. on a brighter note, i dont have to act for Waikiki Wave anymore!! okayy..it was quite fun, but im not exactly a really good actress and im always very nervous :) so its better this way.. and i overshot the deadline of my french homework so i think i failed it. and every time i try to open it, it hangs :( thus, it is HORRIBLE. ugh. anyway..i hope i have happier things to say next time.. and those who can, PRAY FOR MY SPONTANEOUS TOMORROW! everyone else, wish me luck :) thanks. 'He holds me in His hands, although it seems like i'm alone, i know that i- i can count on Him all my days.'